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"Arghhh" Taehyung whined laying flat on the cold floor as I was doing the same.

"It's so hoooottt" he complained facing me with a pained expression.

I nodded changing back.

"Ya get up" Jimin ordered "we've got a schedule to attend in a few hours"

"Don't wanna" he replied.

"Get uuuup" Jimin shouted while fail-attempting at pulling his friend up.
"Taehyung I swear I'm gonna call Seojoon-hyung and tell him you don't wanna come"

"Ok" he nonchalantly answered.

At that Jimin huffed and walked away, being done with the lazy Tae.

Half an hour passed and the boy was still in the same position as before, with his eyes closed he wondered his mind off to dreamland.

I got up and brought a blanket to cover him up since the floor was cold so in case he suddenly dropped his body temperature.

"Jiji you shouldn't spoil him like that" Jungkook adviced taking a seat in the living room, eating from a circular piece of watermelon, which was weird to eat from honestly. "He'll keep on acting even more lazy"

Just then Taehyung moaned in his half sleepy state.
"Jiji I'm cold"

Worry was starting to take over me so I bent down to check his forehead, if he had a fever.
And he was burning.

I quickly warned Jungkook who ran towards his hyung concerned, probably more than me.

"Thank god" the boy sighed of relief after checking "it's just a fever...ya you gave me a heart attack don't scare me like that".

He paused for a moment, already knowing what to do.

"Anyways it's not like hyung can stay at home because of a simple fever"at Jungkook's comment suddenly I seemed to realise how hard it was to live the idol life.

Nothing of that had to do with me but I felt heavily guilty, reminiscing on the time I'd spent wishing for them to comeback or do vlives and things like that.

A burden took over me and all I could do was to suffer under it's weight.

'Taehyung is not going anywhere until he's perfectly fine' I wrote on a post-it.

"Jiji come on don't insist" Jungkook replied.

'No I insist' he huffed and was pleading me to not interfere but I just couldn't let it slide like that.

"What's wrong" Hoseok all ready to go out joined us as Taehyung was still lying, asleep.

"Hyung Jiji keeps telling me to leave Taehyung at the dorm"

Hoseok's cheerful beam dropped gloomy "So?" his voice sounding irritated.

"So what?"

"It's not like you're gonna listen to her" what he just said appeared incredibly hurtful and I was actually hurt.
Seconds filled with silence flowed as Jungkook glanced at me, then back at his hyung.

"What are you waiting? Wake Taehyung up and let's go" he perfectly obeyed the elder's order while I still felt extremely hurt.

Never knew words could be this painful.

A little while after, they left and no, I couldn't help Tae even if he was begging me to convince the others.

The main consequences of Hoseok's words gradually came afloat, when no one was around.
In my mind time had stopped in that exact moment and that sentence kept replaying over and over again.
Everytime it happened my heart broke a bit more into shattered pieces.

I tried to give myself any possible reason, spur of the moment, a bad day, to prove that his intention wasn't to wound me yet I couldn't help it.

Maybe it wasn't so deep but when you love someone, the very tiny action of that certain person amplifies vertiginously and it becomes dreadful.

The boys returned after half past midnight.

I wasn't asleep, not at all, my brain was wide awake.
My both physical and emotional state wasn't in any way presentable so I'd decided to stay inside my room when someone knocked.

"I'm coming in" he said as loud as a whisper.
The boy calmly brought himself closer to my bed and sat in front of the side table.

"Ya why are you sleeping" his whisper was clearly audible.
It was beautiful to hear his voice again after such a long day.
Then he chuckled, gently caressing my cheek.

I didn't know how to feel.

First he tells me off and then, he acts like nothing happened. No actually it was my fault for taking it so seriously, yea... what an idiot.

"Did you cry? Your pillow's all wet. Why did you cry?" this once Hoseok ran his hand through my hair.

Blood was starting raise till my cheeks.

NOOO HE'S GONNA KNOW I'M AWAKE FREAK FREAK FREAK, I started panicking internally.

Hoseok chuckled again.
"I know you're awake pabo".

My eyes fluttered open and the first thing I saw were his perfect features.

How I wish I could've savoured that moment forever.

It surprised me, the closeness.
My heart did backflips and cartwheels and dropped very low into my upside down stomach.

"Did you cry?" Hobi softly questioned taking his hand back.

I hid my face between the covers as he brought them away gently, like before.

"Why?"

Yea, why?

I didn't know either.

"Tell me" he rested his head on the side of the bed which meant he was very close.

'Really it's nothing' I typed despite my shaky hands.

"Jessie look at me"

I couldn't dare.

Waiting for an answer, silence fell again.

'Why are you in my room????' I tried to find a way out of that heavy situation.

"Don't change the subject" his gaze was piercing holes in my soul.

'I'm gonna sleep go away' I made an attempt at acting rude, hoping he would, covering up the trembling feeling whenever he was too near.

"Ya stop ignoring me" a serious aura sorrounded him.

'Istg' I wrote but stopped halfway when I couldn't find anything to say.

"Yea?"

'Bye' I turned on the other side hoping for sleep to find my tired body.

For a while Hobi hadn't had any reaction so I thought he was about to leave when he got up.
But no, he walked to the other side and literally jumped beside me.

I was about to die from shock and my face was filled with anger, which the boy replied with a playful grin.

"Now you can't avoid me" he circled his arms around my waist, pulling me closer.
"It's ok though. Answer me tomorrow, I'm tired now" and just after commenting, he fell asleep before me in that embarassing position.

If feelings were waves, I could've drowned in the waves that overwhelmingly flowed and made it impossible to breathe.

What do I do with you...








I'm really sorry for the crappy and lazy updates but I swear I'm trying hard to keep my grades decent, a social life, keep up with this and with bts all at the same time and yea it's flippin hard

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