The Real You (BWWM)

13: Do you hate me

Landon's POV 

May 15th, 2016 

I sit at my desk drawing another picture of Kyra (Ava?). She seems to be my only inspiration to draw lately. But I don't mind. Being able to draw her beauty in different is actually fun. "Landon. Bring your laptop." Kyra whispers to me by my door. She motions me to come follow her in her room and I comply. She closes the door and I hand her my laptop. 

"What did you find?" I ask her taking a seat next to her on the bed. 

"What college does your brother go to again?" 

"Princeton. Why?" 

"Well, I found out that he goes to my therapist. I looked through his file while my doctor was out of the room and found out he has schizophrenia and psychopathy."

"I didn't know he went to the therapist." 

"Exactly!" She said, enthused by her investigating. "So, I thought, 'What else is he hiding?' So, we're going to see if we can find anything." And that's what we did. Every class picture, club sign ups, advertisement, and big game pictures were checked twice by us. Especially Kyra. I don't think I've ever seen her so passionate about doing this stuff. I check the last YouTube video with him in it and see Kyra sleeping on her bed. I walk over to tuck her in and kiss her forehead. I can tell she's hurting. That everything she went through is washed up to shore once more. I go to close the window on my laptop when I see a link in the description. I click on it and head to my room. A page named ''At Your Service' with a password loads on my screen. If Jacob is apart of this, he would use the date of the first love of his life-his birthday. 'Grant Access' appears and takes me to a page of  naked girls. I click at the menu section to see the option of looking at the workers. Thousands maybe millions of girls pop up in the workers list. I see a couple of men and find Jacob's face. Surprise but expectation filled me. I clicked on his link and saw photos of him surrounded girls. His address was on as well as his phone number. I went back to the worker list to see if I recognize anyone else. Then,saw it...

Ava Weller.

I'm completely paralyzed. I slowly clicked on her link and picture of her in underwear come up. I feel dirty looking at these. Like I'm taking granted of her trust. I see a Florida address and a phone number. I go to put the address into the URL when I hear someone in the hallway. "Hey." I raise my hand to shyly wave at Kyra. 

"Hi." 

"What are you still doing up?" She says, rubbing her eyes. 

"I was just catching up on something for school." 

"Okay, well I'll see you in the morning.  Night." I nod.

"Night." 

May 16th, 2016 

I sit there withdrawn from reality. Seeing Kyra on that website pained me. The thought of other men looking at her pained me even more. Even though she was in underwear for all of her pictures unlike every other girl, it still hurt. She seemed to want to be there in the photos. Her smile fake like a porcelain doll. I suddenly feel a knock on my head and see its my brother. "Sup dork." I roll my eyes and walk upstairs. 

"Why are you still here?" Annoyance fills my voice.

"I took a leave. It was supposed to be only a couple of weeks but after what happened to mom and dad I thought I should stay for support. 

"That's so sweet Jacob." My mom says with blissfulness in her face. "Oh, remember we have that orchestra tonight with my co-workers." I roll my eyes and head upstairs to get ready. I guess you can say I'm not in the mood for dressing up and going to an orchestra. Can't blame a guy.

I run back home, trying my hardest to make it before anyone else does. Mom is at work, Jacob is at the bar, and Kyra is still at school. I open the front door and run upstairs to my room. I go on At Your Service again and go down to Kyra's (Ava Weller's) link. I copy and paste the address into google and see articles pop up. I click on all of them one by reading every single word. All the information I got was that the family were religious, Ava's brother was good at football, and they had a pet named Olly. I also found out that she was excellent at photography, she wants to be a psychiatrist, and she has depression and bipolar disorder. There's a man in one of the articles and I look him up. Charlie Gold has been incarcerated twice for public intoxication and battery and if affiliated with multiple gangs . He's also her ex boyfriend. Why would she date a guy like that? I hear the front door and I quickly close my computer and walk downstairs. "Landon? What are you already doing home?" 

"They let us leave early if we wanted but Kyra decided to stay." 

"Alright well start getting  dressed."

"Alright." 

I wait for Kyra at the door while my mom and Jacob are already in the car waiting. Kyra walks downstairs holding the bottom of her dress. "Sorry it took so long. Your mom bought this offline and it doesn't fit all that well." I smile. 

"You still look beautiful." She smiles brightly at me blushing. 

"Thank you. You look very handsome." I laugh at her comment and open the door for her. 

"Wow." Kyra says in awe. The auditorium for the show is truly amazing, drawings everywhere and very influential people here. 

"Amazing right?" I ask her. She scoffs.

"You can say that again." The show begins to start and we take our seats. 30 minutes into the show and I look over at Kyra. She seems to be engulfed in the music. My mind runs back to the pictures of her and I close my eyes, trying to get away from the thought. But I never can. 

"Hey." I whisper to her. 

"Yeah?" 

"I need to talk to you outside." She nods and we get up heading outside. We exit the building and stand inn front of a fountain that changes color. 

"What did you need to talk about?" I take a deep breath and close my eyes. 

"I found out what Jacob does." 

"well that's amazing! Where did you find him?" I hesitate to speak.

"A website called At Your Service." I see her freeze up, her hands begin to shake. "I saw your pictures." She starts to breath heavily, tears streaming out her face. 

"You shouldn't have done that Landon! You-you should've clicked away." She holds her stomach as if in pain. "Why did you do that!? Did you look up anything else about me?" 

"I found your address and articles about you." She starts to pace back and forth. "Look I know you had a bad past and that's okay. I can help you with Charlie."

"No!  No you can't! You wanna know why? Because he is a bad man and will tear you apart Landon! You can't fix everything you can't make this world a better place! You wanna know who I am so bad huh!? I'm dirty lying whore that uses everyone to get what she wants. I knew your brother was apart of Charlie's shit the whole time. Hell, I even know your mom and dad are apart of it. But I didn't know about you till I saw you with my own eyes. And you were everything that I had needed in my life. You stuck your nose where it shouldn't have been and you saw that side of me. Why do you care so much about my fucked up life!?" She starts to walk away and I yell out at her. 

"Because I am in love with you Ava!" She stops in her tract and turns back to me and looks at me as if nonsense came out of my mouth. "I care so fucking much about you because before you I was nothing! You are reason I have any will to live anymore. You can yell at me, curse me out, tell me that I'm a fool for what I feel, you could spit on my feet and use me for all you want but I won't care one bit. And I'll be damned if anyone tries to hurt you anymore. So that's why I care so much Ava. Because I am madly in love with you." Silence fills the air for some time before she shakes her head. 

"No. You don't love me." And with that, she walks off. Leaving me there a broken man.