Living Like This

Twenty-Eight

"Aaron, I know what you said about going to see Gabriel, but... I was hoping that maybe... you would consider going with me to see him?" Aaron looked up from his phone at Cas as they ate breakfast one morning.

"Cas, you know we can't do that. Your family was horrible to you, going back to them wouldn't be good for you," Aaron said. "I know you want to see your brother, I understand that. But this is for your own good." Cas' face fell.

"But he seemed so happy to see me. And you would be there. If you noticed something bad happening you could get me out. Please Aaron, I just want to try," Cas begged. Aaron put his phone down, seeming to consider Cas' offer.

"Fine. But if I see one thing out of line, we leave. I can't lose you again," he said. Cas kissed him.

"You won't."

***

When Gabriel opened the door that afternoon, he was smiling, but Castiel felt like it was a little forced.

"Hey Cassie!" He said, standing aside to let Cas and Aaron in.

"Hi Gabriel. This is my boyfriend, Aaron," Cas introduced. Gabriel nodded to Aaron and Aaron nodded back, the distrust between the two clear to Cas. Cas took a breath and sat down on the couch. Gabriel sat in a chair across from him and Aaron sat next to him. Cas smiled at Gabriel.

"Have you done anything fun recently?" Cas asked Gabriel.

"My life is nothing but fun. Sam and I went out a few times, had some fun," Gabriel said.

"You have a boyfriend?" Aaron asked. Gabriel nodded.

"Sam Winchester, my moose," he said. Aaron shifted.

"Winchester? Like Dean?" Aaron asked.

"Yes, he's Dean's brother," Gabriel said. Aaron looked over at Cas.

"I didn't know that," he said. Cas took Aaron's hand but didn't day anything.
"Anyway-" Gabriel was cut off by a knock at the door. "Sorry, I'll be back in a sec." Cas turned slightly in his seat to get a better view of the door. As soon as Gabriel opened the door, Cas' breath left his lungs. Dean stood in the doorway, looking like he hadn't slept much recently.

"Hey Gabe. I can't find my phone, I was wondering if I might have-" Dean fell silent as he looked up and saw Cas. Their eyes locked, but neither of them said anything.

"I... I don't know. If you want to come in and look you can," Gabe said, looking between Cas and Dean. Aaron stood up abruptly.

"Cas, we should go," he said. Cas stood up too.

"What? But we just got here," he protested. Aaron grabbed Cas' arm.

"Cas, we're leaving," he said firmly, dragging Cas towards the door. Cas jerked his arm from Aaron's grip, causing Aaron to turn around and look at him.

"I don't want to leave!" Cas exclaimed. Aaron stared at Cas, and Cas felt his resolve start to crumble. Aaron looked mad.

"Castiel. You agreed that you would go with me," Aaron growled.

"Cas can stay if he wants to," Gabriel said. Cas opened his mouth, caught like a fly in Aaron's glare, then closed it again. He felt the fear start to overwhelm him and he burst into tears. Aaron quickly hugged him.

"Oh Cas it's okay, stop crying. Let's get you home," he said, walking Cas past Gabe and Dean out the door and down the hall.

***

Cas sat on the couch as the afternoon turned to evening, trying to hold back his tears. Aaron walked over to him and set a glass of water on the coffee table in front of him. Cas picked it up and smiled at Aaron waveringly, taking a sip.

"Thank you," Cas said. Aaron nodded.

"Are you okay? I have to get up really early tomorrow and I was hoping to get to sleep early," Aaron said.

"I... I'll be fine," Cas said softly. Aaron nodded and headed back into their bedroom. Cas watched him go, placing the water glass back on the table. Tears once again threatened to fall, but Cas swallowed them back and picked up his book, opening it and starting to read quietly, pushing his feelings deep down into himself. This was right, this is how it was supposed to be, and he had to accept that.