prompt; the photo above basically ^^^
[3k words]
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I sat thoughtful headed in my English Arts class, writing the assignment with my head in the clouds.
Today's Prompt: Write something you've always wanted to say
For me, the prompt was simple. I was pretty quiet all the time, but my lack of voice didn't make me any less opinionated. There were a million things I haven't said, but have always wanted to. Like, how right now in the back row the jocks were throwing things at each other, laughing and playing with their fidget spinners (ha welcome to 2017). I really want to tell them to shut the fuck up, but I don't.
Instead, I focus on writing what has been the hardest words for me to say since I was in eighth grade. The words that eat at my mind everyday when he looks at me with those bright blue eyes. The words that constantly get caught in my throat and make my stomach queasy.
I basically, had a huge crush on my best friend Phil. Like, huge.
Phil was a grade ahead of me, so we didn't share any classes except for Art. I'd known him since I started middle school, and I like to say the crush started when I reached my last year, but maybe unconsciously I was just completely infatuated with him the minute he met my eyes.
I was a really sheltered boy back then, still am. I had never been so surprised until he waved at me, black fringe falling into his eyes, and tall frame intimidating me slightly. I had been questioning my sexuality for a while then, because there was this really cute boy in my class called Aiden who I talked to a lot.
Sometimes, even that young, you just kinda know because it's not like you can help yourself. When Phil looked at me that first time, my whole stomach lurched. What's weird, is that it still does, and he's my best friend now.
I made sure to get this down in my notebook, because that's what I decided to do my writing prompt on. The words I've always wanted to say. I'm writing a letter to Phil about all of the things I wish I could say to him, from the butterflies in my stomach, to the way he looks when he smiles, to the way his laugh resonates in my ears long after he stops. Everything.
When I finish, I lean back, feeling like a weight is lifted off of my chest after writing that. And that's when my friend Aiden leans over to me with a smile on his face, "What did you write, Danny boy?"
I shrug, "I wrote a letter."
"Ooh, can I read it?" He asks, being nosy as always. But he was still a close friend of mine, and still cute like when I met him in middle school.
"Definitely not," I say, shaking my head.
He smiles wider, "No? Is it to your boyfriend?"
I blush, "Phil is not...he's not my boyfriend."
"But you knew exactly who I was talking about?" he asks with raised eyebrows.
I feel myself fluster, "Well...I just assumed because-"
"-that's exactly who you wrote the letter to, huh? Oh that's just so cute." Sometimes, I hate the fact that I tell Aiden everything. He knows how I feel about Phil, he's known almost as long as I have.
I sigh, "Maybe."
A mischievous smile splits his face, and before I can do anything he snatches the letter out of my spiral notebook, causing my mouth to fly open in shock. He starts reading and I can't move for a second before I try to get it back. "Give it back!" I whisper yell, and he laughs, starting to read out loud, "There was a time when the moon was ready to fall down, and you talked to me until I slept with it."
