Born in Black and White

Did You Miss Me??

Epilogue - Six Months Later

"How are you supposed to plan a wedding when the soon-to-be-husband's away?" The voice chimed as they opened the door to the small one bedroom flat.

"That's the fun of it! Though its not as if it matters to him. Weddings can be boring, he just wants to show up and have it be done with. He just wants me to have the day I want." The woman chuckled as she carried in bags and dropped them unceremoniously onto the floor. "I should make him wear pink for such a flippant attitude."

Molly smiled, looking around Kairi's flat, comfortable and happy that her friend was successfully re-emerging from her despair. It had taken six months for Kairi to get back to being comfortable around John and then Lestrade, her hugs were becoming more natural and she began to sarcastically flirt with them on rare occasions. Everyone was happy to see that she was taking her life seriously these days. She decided to start exercising, sometimes rather vigorously, but in the end it helped with her stress and anxiety. She also started working part-time at an underprivileged school, tutoring delinquent children the basics of computer science and web design so they would have an opportunity to join a proper work force. She had a consultant status with Mycroft which kept her pretty well cushioned - though she lamented often that he was too uppity to tell her where Sherlock had gone. It was a long six months of confusion and longing.

Molly and Kairi would spend many nights together while John was away on some mysterious errand for the elusive Sherlock Holmes. Molly would soothe Kairi when she had a nightmare, they'd talk, and laugh and make plans. For probably the first time in her life, Kairi was actually making plans. She loved London, but she wanted to travel a little again. She wasn't sure when she would get around to it with all the planning to be done; she still felt terrified to be alone, but eventually that pain would subside. Eventually she'd be able to live and be happy to do so. Eventually she'd stop merely surviving. The next year or so might be that time.

This afternoon was a unique day when they arrived at Kairi's flat littered with some shopping. Every once and a while, Kairi would enter her flat and her home would smell of old books and mint and gunpowder and cigarettes. She'd chuckle at the notion, that he'd stop by long enough to let her know he was there, watching over her some how. It was either that or John and Molly would somehow bottle the smell of Sherlock Holmes to spritz around her flat. It should creep her out, but it was one of the few things that made her feel truly safe.

She missed him dearly.

Every so often she would allow herself thoughts of Sherlock. In recent months, she'd fall asleep and see his face in front of hers, pained and crying and bruised and beaten. Those moments where hurt just seemed to seep from him, haunted her greatly. She was only just recently able to remember what he looked like when he gave her a genuine smile. She was finally able to steal away moments where she could feel his hands on her again and not feel ashamed or sick. It was slow-moving, but it was progress. The small realization that thinking about him didn't have to hurt, was beginning to build. The larger realization of her love for him and his devotion to her was still something that stung in her chest. She didn't want to hope for love, she didn't want set herself up for some sort of catastrophic failure. The fear of losing him, at this point, was sharper than her love for him and it was unfair to love someone like that.

"Oh, what's this?" Molly muttered and Kairi turned from her kitchen counter to see Molly standing in her bedroom doorway. "You've got a box."

Kairi frowned, she hadn't been expecting a package and she felt herself go a little light-headed, "A box?"

Molly walked in and Kairi followed, "Yeah, its got some kind of orchid on it or something." She picked up the flower and showed it to Kairi who smiled and teared up.

She looked at the box with a top that pulled right off and walked up to it and slowly opened it. She looked down and gasped, tears welling in her eyes as she took in the black and brown brindled fur of a lazily sleeping puppy.

"Oh my..." Molly leaned in, muttering with a soft, broken voice.

Kairi leaned down and hefted the large puppy out of the box and it barely stirred before nuzzling against her and returning to sleep. She looked up at Molly with wide, wet eyes and she laughed softly. They went into the front room and sat by the fireplace, gazing at the stocky build and shining fur. Kairi inspected the pup closely, finding it to be a him, she was shocked at his large paws, crinkly skin, floppy ears, and relatively blunt nose. As she traced her fingers over the soft fur of his back, he stretched against her lap and kicked out his leg as an automatic reflex to her gentle scratches. He was a mutt if she'd ever seen one, but the shape of his head said something of the pitt bull family and the size of his feet indicated possibly an elephantine relative or if she were lucky, a mastiff.

She scratched his floppy ears and he rolled in her lap, curling up in an awkward ball on his back so she could rub his belly. It took him a moment, but he finally stirred, yawning loudly as his eyes blinked open and he looked up at Kairi with a wide doggie-grin and a flapping tongue. He flailed in her lap for purchase and began to sniff her diligently, licking at her skin every so often as if to gauge her taste. She placed him on the ground and he began to trot around, sniffing everything and getting remnants of Appa. As if recognizing the previous dog's devotion, he trotted back over to Kairi and sat in front of her, tilting his head to the side.

"Dear Lord he bought you a puppy..." Molly said in a whisper and Kairi glanced up at her with wide, wet eyes.

"He bought me a puppy." She repeated, chuckling, and patted her lap, allowing the dog to settle on her. "We will have to start obedience courses soon." She smiled wide and rubbed his belly. He rolled slightly to allow her more access, yawning as he peeked up at her and started biting at the dangling strings of her sweatshirt.

"You think they have those courses for humans? Might be a good investment. I hope this is all right." Molly added with a soft joking tone, "I swear we didn't know he'd do this."

Kairi nodded, "It's fine. It's perfect really." She sighed with tears in her eyes, "I've wanted another dog, but I couldn't bring myself to look at any prospects. I felt like I was trying to replace him." She paused with a thick voice. Thinking of the loss of Appa still stung brutally.

Molly nodded, "Of course you aren't. He surely doesn't think he's a replacement." She chuckled and pointed at the puppy who was wriggling in Kairi's lap, trying to lick at her hand caressing his belly.

there was a silence that permeated the room, melancholy and elated all at once. The pup continued to adore his new mistress as Molly sat by and observed.

"Well, what's his name?" Molly chuckled and the pup looked up at her quizzically.

Kairi reached a hand out and traced along the brand new, bright red collar around his neck. It had a metal name tag, looped around the material with an engraving. "Toby." Kairi smiled.

TOBY
If lost, please return to Kairi or Sherlock
221 Baker Street, London