Coincidences

Hurt & Acceptance

*Trigger warning

The four week mark was approaching fast and Tyler had barely seen any glimpse of his mate, not that he was expecting to. Why would he look at someone who he clearly despised? Tyler could see his blonde wolf, just as thin as he was becoming, lying on its side, panting. Food tasted like nothing to him anymore, no drive or motivation to even get up and move. It was his family that forced him to get out of bed as the days drifted by in a haze of agony and sadness.

Currently, it was one in the morning and Tyler couldn't take the pain anymore. The hurt at having a mate who didn't even acknowledge his existence. That wanted nothing to do with him. All Tyler felt was pain that sucked the air from his lungs, feeling mottled inside. He could barely sleep, spending most nights staring into the dark, hearing Amilya's soft breaths. The world was gray, pointless, filled with nothing he desired.

Maybe my family would be better off without me? What good am I to them if I am nothing to my mate? Tyler thought morbidly. Was he cursed to remain alone? Just like how he had lived in the wilderness, unloved by his parents who had abandoned him there.

Maybe if I had stayed in those woods, I wouldn't be going through this, Tyler thought bitterly, squeezing his eyes shut tightly. He was sitting on the cold tile floor of their small, shared bathroom, squeezed between the cupboards under the sink and the lip of the shower.

I want to die, Tyler nearly sobbed, hand shaking with the small knife he held. He was scared, but the pain hurt so much in his chest. He couldn't keep living like this. Pretending he could wait for his mate to realize how much love Tyler had to give. Waiting had done nothing as weeks passed by. Gritting his teeth harshly, Tyler set the blade against his wrist, pressing down hard. A bead of blood bloomed against the blade, Tyler's pressure still too light. His hands wouldn't stop shaking. Biting on his bottom lip hard, Tyler dragged the blade harshly against his wrist, blood splattering onto the tile floor. The cut was jagged. A laugh nearly bubbled out of his lips, barely feeling the pain of cutting into his flesh.

Tears dripped off his cheeks, feeling so cold, his body shuttering. This was for the best. Slowly laying down on the tile floor, Tyler watched in a daze as his blood slowly spread, staining anything red in its path. Time ticked slowly, teasing his life that should just end. Mocking him. Something in him wondering if he should cut a second time. Deeper, harsher. He shouldn't be scared. Him and his wolf wouldn't be in pain anymore if he did this. But his fingers weren't working right, limply unable to grasp the small knife that was just out of reach.

Tyler silently sobbed at his wolf whining weakly, the scent of Amilya's shampoo wafting up his nose. He remembered the way her hair would twirl when she sparred, training him to fight. But there was no fight left in him.

Somehow, he could smell the scent of rain. He so loved dancing in warm summer deluges, splashing in rivers and puddles. He missed the days when he could smile. The warm small meals he shared with his family, Kai always trying hard to make them something tasty. They always gave him the best hugs, somehow always knowing when he needed one. Raven tutored him in his studies, things always making sense when Raven taught him. Tyler knew he wasn't the smartest person and it was hard for his head to make sense of a lot of the subjects that were taught in school.

He was the weak link in their family. Useless, unnecessary. No wonder his mate didn't want him. His fingers weakly stretched out to grab the blade awkwardly, lifting it to his bleeding wrist. His head throbbed, his vision going fuzzy. One more time. Then, it would be enough.

"NO!" Amilya's voice ringing out in the bathroom, Tyler wanting to flinch at the loud noise, but his body wasn't listening to him anymore.

"Kai!" Amilya bellowed in a command, Tyler getting scooped into the woman's lap. Her hand cradled his head, her hand clamped down hard over Tyler's wrist. The rumble of pairs of feet were headed towards the bathroom, Tyler too weak to tell them to leave him. That they shouldn't be there. Amilya kicked the small knife away in anger, tears falling down her cheeks. A sob bubbled out of Tyler's mouth, the woman's scent rolling out of her. Like it was trying to protect him.