Harley Delaney

The Things We Say Exhausted

"You don't have to say it back."

Opie added, his eyes still closed, after a few moments of silence.

I did love Opie. I always have. It was a strange kind of love. It destroyed me, but also healed me. Opie was like the best, and the worst for me.

No matter how many times I tried to let him go, it wasn't happening.

I cleared my throat. "I love you too Opie. I really do." I replied as I closed my eyes as well.

"And what about Juice?" He mumbled.

Juice. He was different. Did I love Juice? I don't know. Things weren't that simple, not with him.

I never meant to get close to him. Or anyone here for that matter. But I did, and it was amazing.

I keep replaying that night in my head, and wishing that I hadn't had to deal with everything that happened after it.

I hadn't felt happy since.

My best friend died, I can no longer see my own father, I was pushed into being a full member, and here we are.

But the thing about Juice, that keeps me from being able to say those three stupid words, is that after everything, he hasn't even treated me as a friend.

And it hurt.

"No." I answered as I opened my eyes, but it didn't feel real. I didn't even believe myself, I doubt Opie did.

He chuckled, and opened his eyes to look at me.

"I know when you're lying Harley. Admit it, if I weren't here, or if the two of you hadn't felt guilty, he'd be the one you'd be with tonight. And you'd actually be happy, instead of pretending to be."

He explained, his exhaustion making him honest and blunt, even more so than usual if possible.

"And if Donna were alive you never would've even spoken to me when I came back." I replied, as I breathed a laugh.

He chuckled, as he closed his eyes again.

"Hitting below the belt a bit there, aren't you?"

I shrugged. "Learned from the best. You always take things too far. You know, like you did with Juice." I replied as I closed my eyes as well.

"Touché."

Was the last word spoken between us before we finally faded off to sleep.