Fall

Chapter 14: "Numb"

HI GUESS WHO'S BACK? It's been ages since we updated but here we are, and I promise this chapter is one of our favorites. Starting from now, we're going to use POVs when needed, because we want to show what Elena and Justin are exactly feeling and see each other through their minds. 

If you want you can listen to "Say something- A great big world Ft. Christina Aguilera". It got us pretty emotional!

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Elena’s POV:

The drive back to my hometown seems almost endless. I don’t know how we reached my birthday party in such short notice with Jane.

My birthday party… Yesterday seems so far away all of a sudden. I close my eyes and take a deep breath, but my heartbeats don’t want to calm down. This gulp in my throat that I want to push down so badly keeps rising more and more whenever his image crawls back into my imagination.

My hands shake against the steering wheel and the hotness rises through me again. My palms are sweaty but icy cold. The honks behind my car wake me up when I notice I have been drifting off the road to the other direction and almost hit another car.

My instincts scold me when I immediately rotate the wheel back to the right track. I bite the inside of my cheeks refusing to let my tears fall down. No, I’m not giving up. I’m not going to be a crying little bitch anymore. I have wasted a lot of my time brooding over him, over what he had done to me, what he had made me feel. I can’t keep doing that.

I can’t keep roaming around the same point to always end up getting hurt.

He ruined my relationship with Ryan.

No, he didn’t. That was all you. You did this to yourself, and chose him over Ryan. You didn’t even choose him, you smugly cheated on Ryan.

Why do I always have to listen to my brain reasoning with me?

The next thing I feel is the sting in my knuckles when I punch the wheel my breathing accelerating by the seconds. I turn on the radio, maybe music will keep my mind off of things for the moment. It might erase the image of two brown eyes grazing down my face and body, and cover his voice telling me it will be alright.

My favorite station is playing something R&B and it makes me relax a little bit. Even with the party songs they’re playing I still can’t put myself in a party mood. I was down at the bottom. This bottom that I never thought I’d reach with Justin. He has always been the one to comfort me and release me from my pain. Ironically, he’s the one to cause all the pain I’ve lately been feeling.

I know for sure you still think about me no matter what.

I look over the car board and manage to open it while keeping my car running steadily. My fingers go through the hard plastic under it. I open it and pull the CD marked with “For Elena” and run my thumb over it before I place it inside the player.

I’m going to regret this. I know I will, but temptation is stronger than me.

Regretfully I press play and his voice rakes through me.

Elena.

The way he sounds when he says my name is flawless. A chill runs through me, and my legs go numb.

I never saw anyone as beautiful as you.

He saw plenty of women. He slept with them all. He knows about a woman’s body more than I do sometimes, and it surprises me how he knows how my body responds to his touches even when the closest thing we have gotten to together was hugging and kissing.