As soon as I dropped Sophie off, I called Matthew. I told him I was coming by. Normally I would just show up unannounced and let myself in but I learned the hard way that I should never, ever do that again.
Sophie was back in my life. And I desperately needed someone to talk to about this. Matthew and Sophie had become good friends when we were still together.
'When we were still together.' That still stung like a bastard.
I knocked once on Matthew's door then let myself in. He was sitting on the couch, thankfully fully clothed.
"You're never gonna guess who was at the bar last night."
"Your mum?"
I stopped in my tracks. "My mum? Wha'?"
I continued pacing back and forth.
"You alright, mate?"
"No. Eh, yes. I don't know. It was Sophie."
He nearly spit out the beer he had just put in his mouth. "Sophie? Really? Your Sophie?"
'Your Sophie.' Yeah, if only.
"Yes. Sophie. Out of all the bars in the entire world. And she was in the same one as me."
"Well, what happened?"
I stopped pacing again, standing in front of him.
"She saw me and came over. It was a few moments before midnight. I kissed her when it struck midnight."
"You kissed her? How'd she take to that?"
His tone pissed me off. As if I shouldn't had done it. I probably shouldn't have but it was too late now.
"Yeah, well. She didn't seem to mind too much. Until she passed out."
Now he was amused. He was laughing like a schoolgirl.
"It's not funny, man. You're s'pposed to be helping me out here. I'm confused."
I plopped down on the couch beside him.
"It's alright, man. Maybe the kiss wasn't that bad." He put his hand on my shoulder and I slugged it off.
"Still not funny."
He stopped laughing and changed his tone of voice.
"Seriously, man. It'll be alright. Maybe this is your second chance with her. Maybe she regrets everything that happened. Maybe, just maybe, she even still loves your scrawny ass."
He socked me in my upper chest. He wasn't good with sappy shit. Neither was I.
"When are you gonna see her again? Soon, I hope."
"Um, yeah. I invited her to be my date at the wedding."
"Seriously? And she said yes?"
I was annoyed again. It wasn't that big of a deal. I mean, it was but I was trying to play it cool.
"She said yes. It's nothing. Maybe I can see her before then. Like a pre-date. Or not. I don't know what she wants. Fuck, man. She doesn't want me. She never did. Fuckin' fuck." I buried my face in my hands.
His hand was on my shoulder again. "It's alright, man. Don't think like that. If she agreed, I'm pretty sure she wants to see you again. She could have not approached you last night, ya know?"
"True." He did make a point. She could have left if she hadn't wanted to see me.
I thought about our light conversation over lunch. She smiled a lot and it seemed to me like she couldn't keep her eyes off of me. I just couldn't help but also think about when she left me...
We were young but I loved her so much. I would have done anything for her. I still would. Maybe this could be our second chance.
"Did you pick up your suit, mate?" Matt snapped me out of my daydreams. I was thankful for the change of subject.
"Yeah, this morning."
"Wait...so, you never told me exactly what happened after she passed out."
I looked over at him. He had a goofy grin on his face. Fucker.
"I took her back to my place. That was it. We had some Chinese this afternoon and I drove her back to her car."
He looked bored with my answer. I needed to get out of here before I socked him in his face. I stood up quickly from the couch and threw my hand back behind me, gesturing a goodbye.
"Where ya goin', man? You just got here?"
"I have a few errands to run," I lied.
"Alright, see you later, then," I heard him faintly over the slamming of his door.
I made my way down a few flights of stairs then out to the lot where my car was. I ran my fingers through my grease-slickened hair then down the side of my jeans. I reached into my back pocket and pulled out a cigarette. I was in dire need of some nicotine. My first drag took the edge off. I closed my eyes and took a second puff, exhaling slowly.
I got into my car, rolling my window down so I could continue on with my cigarette. I popped open my arm rest and pulled out my notepad and pen. I needed to do what I did best. My only method of forgetting everything else in this world.
Now I can't think of air without thinking of you
I doubt that comes as a surprise
And I can't think of anything to dream about
I can't find anywhere to hide
Our latest album wasn't quite finished yet. I could see what I could do with these lyrics and hopefully get it on the album. I just needed some alone time. And booze. Lots of it.
