12/05/2017
Hey,
I know this is weird but I don't know it anymore. Everyone is starting to act weird..
Yesterday I went to Christina and she literally had tears on her cheeks! I asked her what was wrong, and she didn't answer. She just walked away. While we were supposed to hangout.
Today I asked it again. And she acted like it never happened. I made her clear what happened yesterday and she said: "maybe you dreamed it". I didn't dreamed it. I only wanted to help her. I still want to help her.
I just don't understand why she can't tell me. I used to help her when we were younger and she used to help me. That's how we dealt with things. With helping eachother. Is that over? It can't be we're sisters. Our band is not supposed to get weak.
But that's not the only thing.. Lisa is acting weird to. Everyone is actually acting weird. But right now we're talking about Lisa. Always when we had bandmeetings she used to give a lot of ideas. But lately she is just busy on het phone making weird snapchats. Or just checking twitter she is not really into it anymore. And sometimes she just leaves earlier. Nobody sees it, but I notice it.
It looks like she doesn't have fun anymore in the band. Likes she is not enjoying it anymore. I'm afraid of what will happen if she doesn't want to be in the band anymore. I don't want it to end. But it will if she left. But she will not leave the band. She would've told us. Right?
We all agreed to stay in the band and if we stop. We stop together as a band. Then we will be free to go.
Right now to Amy. Amy is acting weird. But not really weird. She is always everwhere. It's likes she is spying on everyone. Last week I wanted to go out to the mall and there she was! Then I went to Mom and Dad's house and there she was with Dani and Lauren.
Maybe she is afraid to be left behind? I want to talk to someone about all of this, but I'm afraid they will not believe me. Or maybe I'm just overreacting.
I could be wrong to. It are just thoughts of me. I had things wrong before. I can't just image those things.
But now to the next person: Lauren. She is looking sad. I can see it in her face. Just like Lisa with bandmeetings. Her face says it all. She tries to focus, but it doesn't work. And when we correct her she immediately looks guilty. Likes she doesn't want us to get mad at her.
But why would she think that? Did she do something bad? I don't know and it's getting frustrating. I can see my own little sister slowly breaking down. But I can't say anything. Right? If she had a problem she would come to me. She did it before. What's different this time? Does she has a problem with me? Maybe I did something wrong?! I don't know!
It looks like everyone is keeping secrets from me! But I don't even know that for sure! But I know it from someone. I don't what she is keeping. But she is lying to me.
She is lying to us.
Danielle Nicole Cimorelli. She lied to us. She said she would go to an movie with Lauren but suddenly I saw Lauren at the mall. Without Dani.And the thing is. Lauren didn't knew about it either. I think. She could be lying to. Dani is keeping something from us or from a few us. And I know that for sure. I saw it with my own eyes.
It's just so hard. I don't know what to believe anymore. I have the feeling I can't trust my own sisters anymore.
If this is getting worse than we are going to break apart. And that's the last thing I want. But someone has to tell their secret. I just can't ask them!
I just can't. It will destroy us more. They will get mad I know them. When they're afraid people find things out, nobody can know. They get mad. Or they walk away. Or they lie
So I guess I have a secret to then. I know there is something wrong. But I'm not doing anything about it...
Katherine.
I close my diary. This was what I needed. My feelings on paper. I can't tell this to anyone. Not to my sisters. Cause I don't trust them. Not to a friend. Because this is something in the family.
And family business need to stay in the family. "Katherine? Are you home? Can you come to my room?" I hear a voice asking. Amy! Quikly I hide my diary and I walk out of my room to Amy her room.
"Is there something wrong?" She asks me with innocently in her eyes. Why is she looking at me in that way? She is sitting on her bed. Slowly I walk to her to sit next to her.
"No, no, there isn't anything wrong.." I say trailing of and looking at the wall. Which suddenly becomes more interesting.
"If you have something to tell me, you can always tell it to me" she said looking at me with her sweet smile. I'm not going to tell it to her. I don't trust her. Amy is everwhere, she has to know more. But she isn't telling it to me. Why would I tell things to someone, who isn't telling things to me? She began. Not me.
This is a game.. And you can't trust anyone
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Sorry for the short beginning chapters but the story is just coming up. I try to get the chapters long enough but I've to stop at some point to end the chapter ;).
AND THANK YOU FOR VOTING/COMMENTING! IT MEANS A LOT TO ME <3
