Slowly Fading

Terrible

Matthew's POV

My mom practically dragged me back to Cloe's house. I'm ashamed of myself, I don't know why I did it. I'm just selfish and terrible. She made me stay in the car while she goes to say sorry, at least, that's my guess.

Cloe closed the door on my face when I tried. When my mom goes up there, she opens the door with a confused look. She smiles at my mom and I am thinking my mom started talking because her face went from happy to aggravated.

Why is she aggravated? She says something to my mom and my mom says something in return and she looks at me. I decide that I need to know what they are saying.

I go up to the door and hear my mom saying that Cloe should apologize. What the heck? I told her what I did. I thought we were her so I could say sorry, which is rightfully so. I was such a ****. I just ruined her and I-i can't take it back.

My mother claims that Cloe is too stupid to raise herself and that is when Cloe had enough.

"May I ask you who this is coming from? Because right now this seems like a person, who I in fact have never heard of, is telling me I cannot be raised right. Ma'am I've shown a lot of respect and held my patients. I request you do the same, if you would not like to show me respect I could bring this whole situation up with the police, bullying is a felony and I hope both you and your son realize that. Now, may you execute yourselves off of my property? Matthew, I do not understand why you even came along. What you did was against my right and you are lucky I haven't made this anything larger then it is now. Now if you'll excuse me, I have to go 'raise my self terribly' as you would say Mrs. Cramer. Have a nice night." She states firmly then slam the door on our face.

She's 100% right. She could have went to the cops, I know I would of. She didn't though, she just kept it to herself. Gosh, why did that make me want to hug her or even kiss her?

I know, I'm terrible. I did all of that to her because she got along with Chase better then me. That she would have rather had his presence than mine, and I was completely jealous. If I couldn't have her, I had to get rid of the feelings I had for her, but it didn't work.

Once my mother turned around, I did as well, but instead of heading for the car, I sprinted away from the car, my mother and the house. I couldn't stay there knowing she hated me and knowing that I did that. I made her feel vulnerable and unsafe, when I should be making her feel protected and loved.

I blew my chance and it was all because I couldn't stand seeing her happy because of someone else. I released 2 of her secrets, secrets I promised to keep. I don't deserve this, I can't deserve this. Not knowing I ruined her life.

I sprinted straight to the park and ran in deeper. It's night so nobody was there and I just sat down and did something I haven't done in over 3 years. I cried, I cried my heart out.

"She hates me. I was terrible and I deserve it but she hates me." I mumble while crying.

I don't know how long I sat there but it felt like a couple of minutes until I felt arms wrap around me. I didn't check to see who it was at first, I just kept crying and mumbling until I feel the person holding me shaking a bit.

I look up and see somebody I never thought I'd see. Cloe.

She has tears trickling down her face and immediately I wipe them away. "I can't have you crying over me again. You being angry at me is enough if I made you cry because of me, I don't know what I'd do. I'm so sorry, Clo. I know nothing can fix what I did. It was stupid and terrible and hateful and completely drove by jealousy. I'm sorry Clo, I'm really sorry." I feel her small hands wipe the tears on my face.

"I should still be mad at you. I shouldn't even be here, but something made me come because I heard you cry and my heart just- I don't know how to explain it. A pain just ran through my heart and I just had to come, that doesn't mean I forgive you. Not even close, but, gosh I can't believe I'm saying this, I am willing to forgive you slightly. I just can't see you cry." She proclaims while her eyes glisten.

Shocked, I pull her into a bear hug. I start stroking your hair and I hold her tighter.

"Thank you so much, Clo. I don't deserve that but thank you so much." I mumble and she moves closer to my chest and we just lay there under the stars. I keep holding her on my chest and she cuddles closer to me.

She shouldn't do that, she shouldn't just slightly forgive me just like that. I deserve to go through the pain and the torture of having her far. I deserve knowing I tore her life and that I have to live with it. I don't deserve to be the one to put her back together because I'm the one that made the last crack.

My excuse is that hurt people, hurt people. I was hurt and jealous so I hurt other people. (A/N Comment if you know what song 'hurt people, hurt people ' is from.)

"Is it bad that I don't want to be anywhere else?" She says randomly and I shake my head.

"No, because I feel the exact same way."