Runes, Rings, and Little Things

Chapter 60- Jaces Death

**PLEASE NOTE THAT I HAVE NOT COMPLETED CITY OF HEAVENLY FIRE AND NOT ALL OF MY FACTS MAY BE CORRECT**

{CLARY}

My little kids are all grown up. I had Spencer and Will 30 years ago- I'm 49. Spencer is about to be married to a young ShadowHunter named Harry. Will is already married to a nice man named Joshua, and Bennett recently married Trista, with the blessing of Jordan, Maia, Jace and I of course. Jace has been living his life on edge recently, though. Messing with certain downworlders who he knows are dangerous. He claims he wants to work out a better alliance, and possibly a friendship, but Im not so sure. I keep warning Jace not to go near them, but again, he won't listen. He is Jace, after all.
I sigh again, as Jace walks through the door with blood on the cuffs of his white shirt. I groan a bit. "What the hell, Jace?" I demand. Then, thinking, I smirk. "That needs to be washed. Take it off." Jace smiles and obeys. He presses his mouth to mine, and pulls me into his arms.

*****

There was a knock on my door, and I wake up in my bed alone. I quickly pull clothes on, and find Will, Spencer, and Bennett standing at my door, with red cheeks and sniffling. "Oh, my babies!" I yell, pulling them all in for hugs. I hear Spencer stifle a sob, but it was there. They pull away, Spence biting her lip. "What's wrong?" I ask them. I finally notice that they all have white mourning clothes on, as they step into my room. Again, I ask "What's going on? Where is your father?" I demand. Bennett pulls a now sobbing Spencer in for a hug, and she buries herself into his shoulder.
"Mom, please sit down." Bennett politely tells me to do. I do as instructed, and wait. "D- someone died today, as you can see." Will stands by my side and takes my hand.
"Dad was messing around with downworlders, as you know he does. But... Today was different. Dad was tired for some reason and asked us to go along. He went after a couple of vampires, and got into a deep fight. It got so bad, he told us to run and get help. We did, but Spencer ran back to help him, and... She witnessed his death." Will takes a deep breath, squeezing my hand. I can't even feel it, though. I feel numb all over, and all of a sudden I'm on the floor with my head in my hands, screaming. I sob and sob, allowing my kids to hold me and cry along. I eventually hear "Shit. She hasn't been this bad since when you died, Bennett. At least that's what dad told me..." I tuned out after the word dad. I can't even imagine what they're going through. What am I going through? I'm a widow now. I don't want to be a widow. I want my husband back.

*****

White noise is all I hear all around me. I wipe my face as Isabelle chokes out the rest of her speech about her brother. She walks with her head high off the stage but with tears pouring out, and walks into the waiting arms belonging to Simon. It's my turn. I take a deep breath and walk onto the stage. I look down at my notecards then up again. I notice that Isabelle was looking at me, smiling. We had patched up our relationship a while ago, but I could still see the hatred in her eyes at times. Now, all I see is love and forgiveness. I start and end my speech with one of Jace's quirky comments and prepare myself for self pity, which came as expected. I never knew how much my Jace could impact me. I don't want to be a widow, but I know that it's the normal shadow hunters life. I understand that. But I never saw myself as normal, because I'm not. I'm Valentines daughter and Sebastian's sister. I'm "that girl with the weird rune powers". But that never bothered me because Jace was "that boy" with me. I know Jace would want me to be happy but I'll never move on from the love of my life. Ever.