All that I am

Chapter 6

Kanji's POV

I just got back from Tokyo and I'm waiting for Lwandle to come and fetch , I can't wait to see her it feels like ages.
Becky: Kanji right?
Kanji: Yes how do you know me?
Becky: They were showing top ten men of the year and I voted for you
Kanji: Thank you very much and you are?
Becky: I'm Becky
Kanji: Nice to meet you Becky
Becky: You too Kanji so who are waiting for?
Kanji: My friend to come and fetch me
Becky: How about we just together?
Kanji: Oh okay

We both enter in her car and I tell her which street she should drop me off on.
Becky: So are you seeing anyone?
Kanji: No but I'm planning to
Becky: She must be very beautiful
Kanji: She is
Becky: Are you sure you want to go long term right now?
Kanji: Wow I haven't thought about that
I actually haven't really thought about it
Becky: How about you spend some time with me then see if you really want to go long term
Kanji: Nah
Becky: Don't be such a loser
Kanji: Okay then but then just one time
Becky: You will change your mind
Kanji: Oh look it's raining I guess it's a good thing I left with you
Becky: It's a very good thing

Lwandle's POV

I'm so late I'm pretty sure he will be very mad at me. I turn and see him talking to Becky. I put on my hoodie and hide myself with my scarf so they won't see me I stand in front of them so and act cool.
Becky: Who are you waiting for?
Kanji: My friend to come and fetch me
Friend? I'm just a friend after all these years I mean fucking days I waited for him to get over his anger issues and now because his fine he's forgotten me? The one who waited for him? He's even going into her car how could he? I watch the car drive PFF and I just start walking, walking without knowing where I'm going. Then all of a sudden it started raining I just kept on walking until I collapsed all I could see before I was unconscious was blue eyes.

2 hours later

I turn to my other side and see the curtains open and it's still raining, I guess it wasn't a bad dream it was real.
Joshua: Lwandle your awake
Lwandle: You can pronounce it
Joshua: I can but enough about that what were doing in the rain?
Lwandle: I was trying to find the place I belong?
It sounded more like a question
Joshua: What about that dude?
Lwandle: I don't want to talk about him
Joshua: Okay now go take a shower
Lwandle: How did you notice me I was covering myself with a scarf
Joshua: I just did
Lwandle: Thank you I won't forget you
Joshua: Go and take a shower I'm pretty sure they are waiting for you at home
Lwandle: Home huh?

I head to the shower and take a long hot shower, years start falling on their own and I can't control my tears. A man who met me yesterday noticed but a man who knew for more than three years couldn't notice me how could he be blinded by a girl with heavy make up.
Lwandle at the end of the day
No she's white I'm black and besides my dad doesn't like white people I guess I was just asking for too much
What about Joshua?
I'm pretty sure he will understand
That's not fair he helped you why don't you at the very least look at him?
I'm not ready
When?
I'm not sure

I quickly get out of the shower and I find a big sweatpants which I guess is Joshua's and his t-shirt written me, myself and I which explains my mood. I head downstairs and see him with his suitcases
Lwandle: Hey Josh where you going?
Joshua: Dubai but I'll be back after a month if you need anything call me
Lwandle: Sure have a safe trip
Joshua: Kay bye
He gives me a long hug then leaves after he leaves I take a cab and head to my place as I go there I pass Kanji's place and I don't see that bitch's car.

Arrives at the apartment

When I enter I see Kanji and he here's with Becky
Lisa: Lwandle Kanji's here!
Taylor: She missed you so much dude
Lisa sat down me at the couch but I couldn't even look at him or her they disgusted me I didn't how to respond I was just blank.
Sky: Lwandle are you fine?
Lwandle: Yeah
Becky: Hey remember me from that place?
Kanji: You two know each other
Becky: Of course we do Kanji
She laughs like a lady and I on the other side like a man, I guess black will never be enough it's just like Maya Angelou said:
White woman are so lucky
Black men want them and
White men want them
Black women want to be like them and
Work for them

Maya how is it I was so blind not to see this.
Kanji: Lwandle I brought you a novel and anime t-shirts
I couldn't pretend anymore I stood up went to my room and just locked it. I just fell down and cried I cried silently so no one could hear me.
Kanji: Lwandle what's wrong?
Lwandle: You
Kanji: What did I do?
Lwandle: After waiting for you all this time, I thought we were something more but I guess black isn't enough for you Kanji. Deep down I had a feeling this would happen but I just blinded myself I think it's best if black people remain with black people who knows maybe it will be a much more better place then.
Kanji: Lwandle why are you saying this?
Lwandle: I heard you two talking I was standing right in front of you yet you didn't notice me, Joshua White noticed me a dude I just met yesterday Kanji just leave me I don't wanna see you.
Kanji: Lwandle I will leave you for now but I will be back
Lwandle: Don't ever turn back I'm not enough and I never will be, you deserve the epitome of beauty and I will never be that
Kanji: But
Lwandle: No buts go live a better life I guess it wasn't meant to be

Thank you for reading and I hope you enjoyed. May the Lord bless you and please do vote comfort.
Tracy Chapman- Promise
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