i n s e c u r e

thirtythree

Kihyun went back to class the moment the bell rang.

"Yo, where were you at?" Jaemin asked when Kihyun entered the room.

Kihyun just shook his head and sat beside the male.

"Wheres the rest?"

"Probably on their way to class...apparently things got awkward after you left...and I couldnt stay any longer which was why I left first"

"Ah.....is it okay if I sleep for awhile? Im not feeling very well" Kihyun massaged his temple.

Jaemin nodded as he continued playing with his phone.

Kihyun guessed that Shownu went home because , when he went inside Shownu wasnt there.

god....

He sigh as he recall how depressing Shownu looks like.

At this point, he felt like theres only one person to be blame.

And that is him.

Shownu has indeed gave him everything in the amount of time they know each other.

Shownu gave him friendship,love,trust and support all in five months.

He gave him everything that he needed but Kihyun was mad at himself for not returning his kind gesture.

all he ever wanted was you Kihyun ....why the hell are you so blind?

Kihyun didnt know what to do at this point to be honest.

"Ah! There you are!!" Hyerin exclaimed as she sat infront of Kihyun.

"Hey" Kihyun replied,head still on the table.

"Where the hell did you run off to?" Clara asked.

Kihyun look at her momentarily and shrug his shoulders. Having a conversation is the last thing he wanted to do now.

"I saw Shownu earlier on...probably going out of school" Hyerin continued.

"Yeah...he reek of alcohol and he smell so bad" Clara added on.

"He went out of school?" Hyukjin asked as the two of them nodded.

"Weird guy...do you know that I once saw him at the convenience store, buying all sorts of beer and alcohol...not shocking but it seems like he has a serious drinking issue..."

"Its obvious isnt it? Just look at his face..." Hyerin laugh with Clara.

"Whats wrong with his face?" Kihyun got up, annoyed.

Hyerin blinked her eyes.

"Sorry?"

"I ask you...whats wrong with his face?"

"Didnt you see? He looks fricken awful with those dark circles and eye bags ...Im not saying that we all dont have any but I heard that he used to he a drug dealer"

"You heard a rumour?"

"Yes!"

"And you believe in that stupid rumour?"

Hyerin exchanged glances with Clara.

".....sorry?"

"You know Hyerin....you....you are a bitch...do you know that?" Kihyun stare at the female in front of him.

"...what?" Hyerin click her tongue as Clara and Jaemin had their eyes widened.

"Who are you to judge someone who you dont personally know huh? Who the hell do both of you think you are to assume that Shownu is a drug dealer or a drunkard?! Huh?! No one knows Shownu like I do okay?! He is the most nicest person on earth and he was the one who has been with me throughout the days I needed someone the most! He puts my happiness before him and what did I do?....I chose you over him..how stupid am I huh?....I turn down the guy who appreciates me for who I am AND CHOSE YOU!!!" Kihyun slammed his hands on the desk.

"-YOU KNEW I LOVE YOU EVER SINCE FRESHMAN YEARS BUT WHAT DID YOU DO?! ALL OF YOU MADE FUN OF ME, CALLED ME UGLY AND FAT SHAMED ME IN PUBLIC AS IF MY FEELINGS DONT MATTER TO YOU!I---.....I love you but....you are the reason I wanna kill myself everyday...do you know how much I look forward to school? Just to see you?....of course you dont...not until these past few days...when Im different...you started talking to me...just...what kind of a girl are you? What kind of a human being are you exactly?...and before you say anything about Shownu, take note that he is 10 times better than you are! At least, he has a heart unlike you!" Kihyun grabbed his bag as he stormed out of the classroom, leaving all of them behind, including Jaemin, who just knew about Kihyun's secret.