Longing for the Sea

school subject colors

Since I was young, I associated every subject in school with a color.

Language arts is a tranquil blue. It's a subject that's always felt easy to me, and it's one I've always enjoyed. It's peaceful, calm, fun, and a way to express myself through writing. I loved to read, and silent reading time was the best part of my day in elementary school. The library has always felt like a second home.. I was always good at spelling tests when I was younger, and I never felt like I struggled to grasp grammar concepts. This has always been a class I wish was more challenging at times.

Math is red because I didn't understand and enjoy math until high school. For my entire elementary and middle school experience, math was a frustrating class to sit through. Nothing made sense, and my teachers were no help when it came to answering my questions. I felt stupid and worthless, and I dreaded it every day. My teachers made me feel stupid when I asked a questions, I had to teach myself how to solve certain algebra problems I couldn't grasp, and I was so afraid to ask for help. As they barely put any effort into helping me when I did find the courage to ask for help, I felt like they were just trying to shoo me away so they could get back to checking their email, and it often felt like a pointless class to sit through when my teachers wouldn't even do their job by helping me understand their class. A monkey could've taught that class better than them (at least a monkey wouldn't scoff when I asked a question).

Science is green like plants and trees. It's an elegant and beautiful subject to learn about even when I feel lost at times. The world is such a mysterious and strange place, and science is a way to explore the planet we live on. I thought science was a subject I would want to pursue for a career, but it wasn't until later that I realized language arts was more down my alley. I sometimes found it was hard to grasp the concept of certain scientific topics, and my teachers often did a poor job of explaining things. Again, I felt scared to ask questions because I didn't even know what I was confused about. It's no help to go up to a teacher and say "I'm lost, and I don't even know what I don't know." Even when I thought I understood something, I would get to the test and realize I was completely wrong. But despite all of this, it was still beautiful nonetheless.

History is yellow, as it has always been an intriguing and joyful class. While the stories we learn in class aren't always fun, I still enjoy learning about different cultures and ways of life. It's insightful to hear the mistakes people made in the past so we can make a more joyful and vibrant future for humanity. My 8th grade history class was quite frustrating, but I learned how to study and ask questions in that class. It was the most beneficial class I took that whole year even if it felt like hell on earth at times.

Gym is black. It's a subject I've always and will always dislike with a burning passion in my soul. I have a deep hatred for running the mile and fitness testing, and I think some of the things we do in gym class are utterly pointless. As someone who lacks athleticism, gym class has always been a humiliating environment for me. Swimming in middle school gym was the worst part. I hated having to get my hair wet and ruin my makeup. Why have a pool in a school anyway? Why would I want to get in filthy water other students from my school have been in? It never made any sense to me. It's a class I've always dreaded, and I don't understand why anyone would want to teach physical education of all classes.