Well, I swear that this is my honest option in your book and I don't believe in unnecessary burning so, erm, you're safe. Also if your book is based on any kind of show...please do tell me as I am not really a tv kind of person
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Title: White Noise Author: Abovetheglory Genre: Paranormal
Main Characters: Zak Rider, Grace Martin,Kellin LeCerente and Professor Randal Walters
I'm really sorry I can't do a list of all the characters as 22 chapters has a lot of characters to list and if i really list them all it might spoli the book,so I'll focus more on how to improve and your chapters.
Summary of What's the book about:
Essentially,it is about a group of investigators solving this murder mystery as recently there have been 3 murders and then came the fourth one, seeing that the murders might be connected,Zak Rider and his team investigates the case and its kinda like a Agatha Christie book.You can't exactly guess who's the murder and that's what make the book so good!XD I had the time of my life reading this book.
Comments about cover page:
Well it certainly has the morbid and mysterious feel to it.However though...it does feel a little plain...how about choosing a picture with more defined details so that it stands out as, lets be honest, we do judge books by its cover and when you type in the title,millions of books will come out so you need something very catching so that you attract readers.Since this is about crimes, how about you show a crime scene?Or detective? Or if you really like silhouettes, you can make it stand out more with more highlights.
I'll do a cover for you on my cover store for free as I find this quite fun😊 You don't have to use my cover though cause I'm not really doing this for advertisement.
Cover page score: 5/10
Comments about the individual chapters:
I'll start with the first few chapters.It was really good,I loved how vivid everything was written as it really allows the reader to be immersed with the book.Because of how descriptive the book is, it is easy to understand and this is good as that means you can tackle wide range of audiences.The grammar was good too, maybe a bit run on but either than that it was good. I like how you build suspense throughout the chapters and emphasizes on the major parts to catch reader's attention.
My advice and comments:
On the writing style of the book, nothing much, just avoid long sentences as readers might not be able to follow you as in one sentence, many ideas may be introduced.Theories that contribute majorly should have its own sentence so as to make things more comprehensible. Also just some like SOME parts of the book is stiff (esp after long dialogue and other areas) Maybe you could try re-reading your book and some parts where it does not good, you can try to better write it.
So to summarise everything HERE'S WHAT YOU CAN IMPROVE ON: 1)Your cover page -so you can grab more attention. 2)Your run on sentences 3) The flow of your story as some parts seem forced.
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HECK YES I WOULD.To be very honest, these is one of the best mystery/paranormal books I've read so far.The style is totally me thus I can resonate with the writing :D Yay you're the second book I've saved into my Library.
And your mark is...
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8.5/10! HIGHEST SO FAR!😆😆😆
Here's how I judged
Language:4/5 - run on sentences Content:5/5
Okay I hope that this is useful to you and if there's anything please do tell me and I'll help! I could really see that you are a passionate author when you texted me today for a review.To me, passion for writing is one of the most essential ethos for a writer so for that, I respect you.
Looking forward to more books by you @abovetheglory!
For the rest of you that has read the book, any comments to Abovetheglory? Type in the comments section below and I'll collate it and send it to her!
Thank you all so much for your support.You guys mean the world to me.
