*CRAY'S P.O.V*
andito kami ngayon ni Nehia sa puntod ni Mommy, after i took some stuffs dun sa bahay, pumunta ako agad-agad dito... i wanna visit Mom. namimiss ko na kasi siya eh...
"Ma, birthday ko ngayon oh, 20 years old na'ko" i said in a low tone of voice as i put down the flowers i brought for Mom.
after putting, naupo ako, and so did Nehia.
i took a deep breath before speaking...
"Ma, kasama ko si Nehia oh..." i said as i'm trying to hold back all the tears that are trying to fall.
"mag-bestbfriends parin kami ni Nehia hanggang ngayon Ma oh... ang tagal na namin diba?" i said as i wipe one tear fell from my eye na nakakawala sa pagpipigil ko.
sigh...
"ang galing diba Ma?" i said, and that's it, i didnt't held much longer and pinunasan na ang mga luhang tumutulo at pumapatak sa lapida ni Mama.
Nehia's comforting me, habang hinimas-himas niya ung likod ko
i looked at her and gave her a sad smile, and i saw a tear fell from her eyes, but she managed to release a smile.
i took another deep breath and looked back sa lapida ni Mama.
i wiped the tear that's slowly rushing down my face.
"Ang tagal tagal mo naring wala Ma..." unti-unting nagka-crack yung boses ko as i try to control myself and hold back the tears again.
it hard trying not to cry when all you wanted to do is just cry
:'(
"miss na miss na kita Ma..."
another deep breath
"SOBRA"
and there, i bursted out crying already.
tuluyang nagbagsakan ang mga luha na kaninang kanina ko pa pinipigilang magsitulo
patuloy lang si Nehia sa pagcomfort sa'kin
"sana *hik* andito *hik* ka pa ma*hik* ... sana *hik* kasama *hik* pa kita *hik* ngayon" i said in the middle of my sobs...
natigil ako bigla sa pag-iyak
i took another deep breath
"i wish, i just didn't called you that early at that time... sana hinintay ko nalang na maka-uwi tayo sa bahay... kasalanan ko ito... these are all my fault..." and again, i burst out crying and crying again.
i tried to wipe out the tears that kept rushing down my face pero, kahit anong gawin kong pagpunas, napapalitan parin ito ng panibagong mga luha...
"kasalanan ko lahat ito... kasalanan ko kung bakit ka namatay ma! i'm so sorry Ma... i'm very very sorry" i said habang humahagulgol
niyakap ako bigla ni Nehia habang hinihimas-himas parin ang likod ko.
"tahan na Cray... hindi mo kasalanan ang nangyari... aksidente lang 'yun... tahan na..."
i hugged her back, tighter and i pushed myself closer to her and i burried myself on her shoulder.
mas lalo akong naiyak sa ginawa namin.
"sana *hik* kung *hik* hindi ko *hik* basta-basta *hik* sinabi kay *hik* mama na *hik* nakita ko si Dad *hik* sana di siya nagmadali *hik* at naaksidente*hik* ... sana *hik* buhay pa siya *hik* ... sana *hik* kasama pa natin siya ngayon *hik*..." i said in between my sobs
