When You Were My Sister

Chapter Five (Why are you keeping secrets?)

Nola  

I took a shower, got dressed in something more comfortable. I wore gray sweat pants and a blue tank top. I dug into the back of my closet until I found what I was looking for, a red metal tool box. I dropped it in the center of my lilac sheet covered bed and sat on the edge, with my foot making nervous circles in the soft olive carpet. I sat in my room looking at my box of secrets for a long while. The struggle inside me to open it was real. I ran my hand over its smooth surface my fingers trembling slightly.

The muffled sound of raised voices caught my attention. The sound was coming from outside. I got up from the bed and walked over to the window. The curtains fluttered in the breeze as I opened the window. The night sky was sprinkled with stars, the crescent moon obscured by ominous clouds. My room was directly above the porch, so whoever it was, was below me.

"lower your voice." Auntie Mora hissed. "Act like you have some sense."

"You are the one to tell me that? I really do not want to get into it with you." Mama retorted.

"Yes, I am!" Auntie snapped. "If you continue like this you will give your grandchildren the impression that you are a miserable old goat."

"Fine!" Mama said, her voice lowered fractionally.

"You can't continue to push her away Ellen." Auntie Mora said. "At some point you will have to forgive yourself."

Mama's distressed sigh carried on the wind. "I do not deserve to be forgiven."

"You do, and you should."

"Do you think she has forgiven us?" There was a little desperation in Mama's voice.

"I cannot be the judge of that. You need to ask her for her forgiveness."

"I wouldn't know where to start."

"You could start my not getting into it every time you are together. Ellen your daughter as returned home. This is hope, a midst our darkest moment. A light at the end of a very dark tunnel."

"No exaggeration needed Mora. I get what you are saying."

There wear retreating footsteps like they were moving further down the porch.

Auntie Mora said something but I could hardly catch what she was saying. I leaned my head out the window. I should feel guilty for eavesdropping on their conversation, but I could not help myself. They were keeping secrets from me and it seemed like the only way I would learn the truth.

"I wish you had told me she was coming Mora."

"I was not sure she would come, you have to believe me."

There was silence for a moment, except for the continues hum of the nocturnal creatures that had come out to sing their vague tune. I waited patiently for them to continue their conversation, my senses alert. I heard faint footsteps walking towards my room, my heart raced.

"We, have to tell Nola." Auntie Mora said, the moment there was a light knock on my door.

"I am not ready?" Mama said.

The knocking on my door persisted.

"Whether you are ready or not, she deserves to know the truth Ellen."

"Nola." Neima called from the other side of the door.

I moved away from the window, disappointed I had to miss the rest of the conversation. Tell me what? That seemed to be the million-dollar question.

I closed the window and took the box up from my bed and hurriedly hid it under the clothes I had mounting up on the floor of my closet. I walked over to the door and pulled it open. Neima stood on the other side looking freshly showered, in sleeping attire. She wore a grey John Hopkins University shirt and hot pink pajama bottoms. Her hair hung around her shoulders slightly damp. She had a big smile on her lips and a container of ice cream with two spoons.