The Cow Hypnotist

Bird PT 1

"Mary!" Lizzie yells. "Where's my hand sanitizer?"

"It was garbage so I threw it away"

"WHY?!"

"It had mold on it! What was I supposed to do? Keep it?"

"Well, it was mine! Warn me next time."

Lizzie and Mary have been fighting ever since the beach incident. In fact, one of their fights had to do with the toilet paper. Anyway, Mary thinks Lizzie looks prettier than her, even though Lizzie's a cow. Maybe it's the bigger boobs or curvier body, but something about her just makes Mary feel ugly on the outside.

They both decide to go to the park that afternoon, grabbing their sunscreen and purses to take along. They take the long walk down in the woods where the tourists usually go to take pictures. They really enjoy doing that because it helps give them some exercise.

However, while they're walking down the little pathway that leads to the other end of the park, Mary and Lizzie walk past a teenager who looked at Lizzie with coo-coo eyes, obviously attracted to her.

"What a beautiful sight to gaze upon." This stranger says, poetically, "She is gorgeous, kind, smart... And yet my favorite animal. I must have her love!" He raises his fist as a sign of triumph, "But, would a young, talented cow want a tiny, weak boy like me?"

He then walks beside them, thinking: This is my chance!

"I heard the gardens were the prettiest sight to behold in this park, but, I think I've found something more graceful and elegant in front of me."

Lizzie giggles, "You mean the daffodils?"

He frowns, clearing his throat, "Um...." He tries to think of another pick-up line. "The daffodils aren't all that's beautiful in front of me."

"Liz!" Mary whispers, getting closer to her, "That guy is trying to get you to like him."

"Oh!" She turns to him, smiling "Look, I'm sorry, but, I'm not looking for a guy at the moment."

They walk away as the guy's heart breaks. He falls down to his knees and looks to the sky.

"No worries, Oneal, she will like me no matter the cost! But, I need to become a cow myself! To the lab!" He then lifts himself up and begins running the opposite direction.

"That guy was weird," Mary says, lightening the mood, "Don't you think?"

"It was sweet, what he was saying and all. But, yeah. He was weird. And besides, since I'm a cow now, how can we even be together?"

"I don't know, Lizzie," Mary says, somewhat annoyed, "I don't know."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Aha! I have found a solution!" He laughs maniacally, "Now I can be with my lover!"

He drinks it as he felt a surge of electricity in his body. He looks at the monitor to see his heart rate rising.

"It's happening! I can feel it!"

Suddenly, something went wrong and he falls to the floor, knocked unconscious by the metal table in front of him.

~~~~~~~~~~

Mary and Lizzie go home and play Uno. Unfortunately, to Lizzie, Mary won.

"I told you once and I'm not gonna tell you again, I am the UNO QUEEN!" Mary pushes the cards off of the table with her so-called, 'awesomeness', "Mwahaha!"

"Calm down, bouncing betty," Lizzie puts her hand on Mary's arm, "I realize you've won every single game we've played together, but you don't have to rub it in."

"I know," Mary smirks, picking up the cards.

Lizzie fixes her shorts as she stands up, "You think it's time to go to bed?"

Mary yawns, "I guess so. I am a little bit beat from everything we did today."

They both then head for their bedrooms, turning off all of the lights that were between the kitchen and the hallway.