The General and the Princess

Chapter 36 || Alleyni

Varyn continued his tale, "I was born somewhere in Sari into a family that was deeply troubled; I was their first child. I barely recall the face of my mother, for when I was only a few years old, a kind, deeply religious man took me in to save me from my family; my mother gave me away to save me. The only memory I have of the parents who surrendered me is a burnt tattoo on my heel. We returned to Silenka where he raised me. Al, that man? He was Lyre. Lyre, the former king of Silenka, Vinrys's brother."

Alleyni's heart stopped and her eyes widened, all breath and thought gone. "What...what?"

Varyn sighed. "I was raised by Lyre as if I were his son, brought up in the castle as a prince. When Lyre was replaced as King of Silenka, we moved to the east of Sari. He...he's a strange, good man. I trained with the best swordsman Lyre could find, and I grew in skill until I was unbeatable. I have yet to be bested. As Lyre's adopted son, I was in Vinrys's court occasionally as I grew up. Vinrys remarked me little, but Kyald and I were friends as children. Then, Kyald was sent away for his protection and I was enlisted to join Vinrys's army. I had seen Vinrys abuse another girl Lyre had adopted and I had seen the way he treated both his imprisoned wife and his mistress. He was cruel. I've seen him gouge a man's eye out with a scimitar when he asked for sustenance for his family. I...I left. I ran away, I couldn't serve him. When I escaped, I killed a man in cold blood who saw me leaving. I killed him, Al. I ran a sword through his heart and didn't feel a moment's regret."

Alleyni stared at him in morbid fascination, the once simple mercenary turning into a troubled prince before her eyes as he continued, "I traveled aimlessly for a few years, learning the ways of the woods and using my sword, my looks, and my court manners interchangeably to keep me out of trouble. A year or so ago, I was hired by a band of well-paying mercenaries to kill off the rich and powerful for substantial sums of money. Lyre, he would be so ashamed of me. But I couldn't go back; I can't go back. I need to kill Vinrys, or the mercenaries will kill me."

Varyn stopped his frantic pacing and took a deep breath, beads of sweating drawing on his forehead. He gazed wildly at her, his eyes appealing to her sympathy and her trust. Alleyni took a deep breath, struggling to process his many words.

"So you grew up as Vinrys's nephew, Kyald's cousin? You were, are, a prince? Varyn, what drove you here? How did you become this?"
Alleyni stood to her feet and touched his shoulder, trying to share what little sympathy she could with the troubled vagrant. His entire frame was tense, and wrinkles of worry had been etched across his face in the last few minutes.

"It's been a long road, and I'm afraid I'm not as strong as you or as good as you. I'm afraid often, and selfish even more. I don't know where I'm headed or what I want. I'm like an animal, doing whatever I must to survive. Torments, Al. I'm so lost."

He turned his back to her, his frame sagging as he suddenly appeared far older than the cocky young man she had met a few weeks past.

"What...what did you mean, when you said you thought I had suspected? I never could have guessed any of this. I still can barely comprehend it."

Varyn turned to face her. "I can't pretend I'm as good or as brave as you. But...Kyald wasn't right. Can you see that now? He was afraid, and he wanted you to fit into his idea of his perfect queen. I can't believe I'm saying this, but Vinrys was right. Kyald tamed you. With a smile, he tamed you. I swear, I would never do that. No one should ever tame you. You're wild, and reckless, and sometimes foolish, but Kyald, he wasn't it for you. You shouldn't have to compromise the very essence of yourself for anyone...do you know what I'm trying to say?"

"That I was stupid for choosing Kyald? Believe me, I've hated myself for that choice for a while now. I don't need you reminding me how stupid I was," Alleyni growled.