Best friends / k.l.

8

Avery

I stayed in my room all day yesterday, no one really cared. No one checked  on me or asked if I was okay. I guess no one cared about me, but I was okay with that. I laid in bed all day and watched Shane Dawson, I was happy alone. I showered quickly while every was still asleep, then I dressed myself. I probably wouldn't leave my room, but I wanted to feel cute. I slowly pulled myself out into the hallway, quietly making my way down the stairs. That's when I seen Kian, great.

He watched me closely as I walked into the kitchen. I opened the cabinet looking for the frosted flakes but of course they were on the top shelf. I sighed as I began to climb. "I will get them." Kian said as he appeared behind me. He grabbed the cereal, a bowl and a spoon, and the milk.

"Thanks." I said, afraid to look him in the eyes.

"Where were you yesterday?" He asked as he sat up on the counter. "I didn't see you all day." He kept his attention on me, I rolled my eyes.

"I was in my room. Considering no one really cared, I seen no point in coming out. " He gave me a confused look. "No one noticed I was gone, so I stayed in my room and watched Shane Dawson." he nodded as his head fell.

"I love you." He mumbled as he twirled his fingers around.

"You love me? Seriously? You love me but you push me aside when you find someone better? You love me but you don't get worried when I don't talk to anyone for an entire day? You love me but you don't even make an attempt to make sure I'm okay? I'm sorry, but I don't believe that." 

"I do love you, I really do." He pulled himself off the counter as if he was going to leave the kitchen.

"You don't love me. You will never love me." I sighed. "Not in the same way." I mumbled lowering, but I still prayed that he heard me.

**

Kian and me stayed quiet with each other today, but he still stayed by me. It was just the silence that was heartbreaking. I wanted to talk to him, but I wasn't going to break first. "Earlier," He started to say as I jerked. He half laughed before he continued. "what did you mean by I don't love you in the same way?" He adjusted his position to where he was facing me.

"Um," I didn't want to tell him. "Nothing. Don't worry about it." I tried to blow it off, but I don't think he is going to drop it that easy.

"No, there was a sense of hurting behind it. I could hear it in your voice, so what's going on? " I shrugged as I tried to avoid it. "Avery, please tell me." He begged.

"I have been trying to tell you for a while now, but every time I do things go wrong. We always get interrupted. It isn't meant for you to know, and that is obvious. Please just drop it." He shook his head.

"Avery, I need to know. If you have been trying to tell, then tell me right now. Forget everyone else in this house, they don't matter right now. Its just me and you. " He smiled. "Look at me and tell me. Nothing is going to interrupt us, and if it does then we can ignore it." I sighed as I nodded my head.

"For a long time, I have liked this guy. I mean our entire lives, and I mean he's amazing. I love him more than anything in the whole world. He is always there for me whenever he can be. He has the best personality, and everyone loves him." I sighed as Kian continued to listen. "There is a huge problem though. This person has never known of my feelings because they were masked. They were always covered or hidden away. I never wanted anyone knowing because it was something that scared me, but I guess not anymore. The entire reason I never told this person was because I was one hundred percent sure they didn't feel the same way. I was afraid if I told them then all the cute moments would fade. I was afraid that everything would fade away." He let everything sink in for a minute. He was trying to process it and think of a response.

"I am actually in the same situation, so maybe we can help each other." He smiled at me. "I have had an unbreakable love for this girl for most of our life. At first, she was just another girl but then it all changed. One day she smiled and everything fell into place. It was like in that moment the world stopped and everything was perfect. I swear because of her my dark days are brighter, and my cold days are warmer. " I nodded as my heart beats started to speed up. "This girl is breathtaking. She is literally the perfect girl. She has the biggest heart and she always cares, and she is always there. I can always depend on her. The entire reason I never told her was because I was scared. I mean terrified that she wouldn't think of me in the same way, then everything would be ruined. I couldn't deal with the pain of losing her." He slightly frowned as he dropped his head.

I picked his head up and smiled. I looked into his eyes as if I was looking for something and maybe I was. I watched as his pupils dilated, I smiled even brighter. I didn't think as I pressed my lips to his, it just felt right.  When I pulled away he looked shocked and my heart sank. "I'm sorry, I wasn't thinking." I said as I pulled myself away from him. "I need to go." I darted off the couch. I grabbed my keys as I darted towards the door.

"Don't leave." Kian said as I shut the door behind me. I didn't waste anytime before getting in my car. He pulled himself onto the porch as he watched me pull away from the house.

"You're an idiot." I mumbled to myself as I slammed my hand against the steering wheel. "You probably ruined everything." I felt a hole in my heart and I wanted to cry. "It will be all your fault if he hates you now." I was so mad at myself that I couldn't deal with it.