E P I L O G U E | P A R T 01

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TO SAY I HAD A safe landing would have been an understatement

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TO SAY I HAD A safe landing would have been an understatement. My back hit something hard and I laid there for several moments, groaning and focusing on the sharp pain. I knew I had landed on a wooden floor but exactly where I had landed was a good question.

I immediately checked to make sure all of my body parts were still there—thank God. However, I was no longer in the clothes I was wearing before. I wore a pair of basketball shorts and a shirt that had been washed too many times because the text had faded almost completely. My wedding ring was no longer on my finger, reminding me I was single at this part of my life. Gradually, I rolled over onto my side to see a stained mattress laying on the floor beside me. There was a blanket that was not big enough to cover an adult's entire body and a pillow without a pillowcase. I recognized the room as my own.

The apartment I was in belonged to me.

Pushing myself upward, I backed out of the room and ran my fingers along the walls as I approached the living room. It was empty, of course, because furniture was expensive, even if I wanted to rent it. Thinking about how I used to live, I realized everything was expensive and living was hard. I stopped just as I noticed a piece of paper and pen on the living room floor. Memories of writing that unfinished letter reached my mind. A small smile spread across my lips and I covered my face with my hands.

It actually worked.

I had actually traveled back in time.

Cassandra had somewhat convinced me this was just going to be a fail and I was afraid. But here I was in my apartment from six years ago. I found myself laughing in my empty living room, my shoulders shaking slightly and my eyes squeezed shut. If I did things correctly, I could change the future and make things right. The fate of the future was in my hands...my very shaky and unstable hands.

My eyes opened and I took a step forward, the piece of paper crumbling under my bare foot and I glanced down to see the white sheet. Kneeling down, I carefully picked it up and ran my fingers over the words I remembered writing, the words I remembered I needed to put down on this piece of paper and get them out of my system. Running my fingers through my hair with one hand, I quickly scanned over the paper with a deep frown.

Mom,

I owe you an apology for my actions and behavior and I want you to know it was never my intention to hurt you. There is no explanation for my lying and I now understand why you put me out to live on my own. We've bumped heads many times but you should understand that my actions are not a reflection of your role as my parent.

How I acted was extremely inappropriate and immature and I can see all of this now that I look back at the incident that led to you putting me out. I have to take responsibility not only for what I did but also for the way I made you feel. I really don't want to let you down again and so I'm trying to think of ways to prevent anything like this from happening again.

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