Only Him

Chapter 28

I heard the whispers following me as I walked with Olena, Karolina, Sonya and their daughters through the gardens by the chapel. It was Sunday and they'd wanted to attend services. We'd been planning on going as an entire family but Viktoria had shown up at our apartment just before we left for services and after two days of silence she'd begged Dimitri to stay and talk with her a bit. So we'd ended up going without them.

As I heard the whispers and speculation behind me I kind of wished Dimitri had come. Over the past week or so I had caught people staring at me, scrutinizing as they started to see the changes in my body but were unsure if it was just their imagination. The further along I got, and the more defined my belly got, I saw that speculation turn into criticism. People didn't tend to make comments when Dimitri was around but I could hear them now. Whispers trailed behind me and I often caught phrases like "....she is pregnant!" and "...heard Belikov was furious. That's why he isn't here today." And my favorite "...if she even knows which Moroi knocked her up?"

I grit my teeth harder with each comment and tried my best to ignore it. It wouldn't do me any good to get into fights or draw attention to myself now. We'd known people would gossip and assume the worst. When we officially came out and acknowledged my pregnancy we'd tell people the truth, whether they believed it or not. But knowing people would say the worst and hearing it were very different things. I was reminded of my days back at St. Vlads when Jesse and Ralf had spread some pretty nasty rumors about me. I'd been distraught at the gossip and slander on my name. How was this any different? If anything it was worse because I couldn't refute the physical signs of their gossip.

Karolina slipped an arm around my waist and drew me closer to her side. "Would you like me to go set them straight?" she asked quietly. Most of the time I only saw Karolina as Dimitri's sister and a mother of two. I tended to forget that she was trained as a guardian and indeed fully capable of setting people straight.

I shook my head, grateful she was even willing to. "No, let them talk. We haven't officially announced anything, though I guess its kind of obvious." I looked down at myself. I'd been forced into one of my nicer maternity outfits for services and the shirt—while holding a higher than average percentage of elastic and spandex—still clung to my body, revealing the defined bump at certain angles. "I can't get mad at people for assuming the worst when it's all they know. I just hope we can at least change a few minds when we do tell." I thought it was a pretty big indication of my own maturity that I wasn't trying to leap at people and beat the truth into their stubborn minds. The old Rose would have and it gave me a little bit of hope that maybe I was mature enough to be a mother. If anything it was definitely an indication that Dimitri's zen lessons had rubbed off on me over the years.

We continued on to the commercial section of Court where a number of eateries were located. We were planning on meeting the missing members of our group, as well as Lissa and Christian, there for a late breakfast. We were just passing through the clothing sector where the more expensive clothing stores were located when I nearly ran into someone exiting the tailor shop.

Nathan Ivashkov brought himself up a few inches short of me, surprise flickering in his eyes. He had changed over the years. After Adrian's marriage to Sydney and his divorce from his ex-wife he'd tried to shy away from public notice. I'd always thought it was because he was shamed by Adrian's actions (though I thought the reverse should be true). He was leaner now, having lost some of the paunch that accompanied rich eating and little exercise. It had been an uncommon sight on usually slender Moroi but now he looked to be in better shape. His lions mane of silver hair was also tamed in a more subdued, common style. He still put on his arrogant demeanor around others, particularly me. He'd never liked me when I dated Adrian but I wondered how he felt about me in comparison to his daughter-in-law.