sorry » im youngmin

2.0

i have been sitting on my bed, staring at the photograph in front of me before a knock on my door distrupted my thoughts. i smiled upon seeing the tall figure at my doorstep. i made a space for youngmin to sit on my bed by pushing all my study materials to one side. he came in and sat beside me, staring right ahead where the photograph was hung. he knew exactly what were my thoughts.

my eyes were gloomier and darker than usual.

i was feeling depressed.

the negativity kept haunting me. continuously blaming myself with every chance i got. if it weren't for my ignorance, donghyun would be alive.

youngmin patted my back, his eyes were brown, his eyes spoke to me that it's alright, that i should move on. just like how he constantly reminded me.

" we need to go soon, hurry up and get ready. i'll be waiting downstairs. " he smiled softly and slightly pinched the bridge of my nose.

it's hard to tell youngmin's feelings. his soft tone would show that he's tired. surely, there's another meaning behind his soft tone but i can't figure out what and why. i sighed, looking up to the photograph of donghyun smiling widely, with his arms around my shoulder.

i miss you.

i got ready for school as quick as possible, and skipped my way to the dining room where, my best friend, and my mom is sitting down, eating breakfast. my eyes were no longer dark brown. it's brighter now, as i got reminded that there will be a school trip later. i gave my mom a good morning kiss on the cheeks and saw her ears turn red. she felt happy. i glanced over at youngmin's direction and he looked as if he have not slept for days. he looked sad, dejected. i pinched his cheeks and looked at him, cheerfully.

"if you ever need a mom to be by your side, there's always my mom. and if you ever need a sibling by your side, there's always me."

he smiled, while looking at me in the eyes, before breaking away the eye contact to eat his breakfast. being close friends with youngmin, it scares me to not know his feelings. i still get confused about his feelings, it's hard for me to tell. and i am afraid that, i am not able to tell whenever he needs help. and i am afraid that i'd lose someone important to me, again..

i'm sorry i made donghyun the one who died ;; coming out with korean names are hard