ironic

was

"Now get out of my face."

Everybody scrambles out of their seats, one even falls down and knocks the one next to him as well. Lisa snorts at them.

Bambam shakes his head while his face holds an amused expression. He watches as the people struggle to get out of the meeting room.

It really was amusing, as their people were only the bravest and most unfazed. But when theyre facing Lisa, they act like little Timmy Turners facing babysitter Vicky.

Take Goi Hoon as an example. He's one of the best; really rude and carefree too. But when he's with Lisa, he acts like somebody who lives to impress. Just like everybody else.

"You need to go easy on them, lis."

"Do I?" Lisa chuckles. "I didnt even do anything. Theyre scared about no reason at all, not my problem."

"Yeah but-" Lisa shushes her best friend, "Hush. Doesnt matter."

"Hey guys-- oh."

Lisa gapes, before making whiny sounds at Namjoon, who just entered the room.

"That door knob just got replaced two weeks ago." Namjoon smiles sheepishly before awkwardly placing the door knob back where its supposed to be, looking completely broken.

Bambam is so close to buying the tallest bubble wrap available and using it on his friend.

"Anyway," he coughs, "Police are suspecting us, again, as the masterminds of the Ril Bombing."

Namjoon throws a newspaper at the table, with a huge ass headline saying Z Nefari, mind behind the Busan Ril Bombing. Could they get anymore heartless? Read more on page 5!

Bambam sighs, "Why am I not surprised?"

"We're shitheads and all but we'll never kill anyone." Lisa grumbles, visibly pissed off. "hypocrites blind to the fact that we're not the only dangerous group in this place. Idiots."

"What are we gonna do then?" Namjoon asks, softly.

"Nothing.." Lisa hesitates, "I mean they wont find anything. We're safe."

"What if--" Lisa cuts Bambam off again with an annoyed sigh, "Ugh. I hate those words."

Their conversation gets interrupted by the sound of Namjoon's phone ringing. Lisa raises a brow at him, who just shrugs.

"Excuse me, Ill be back in a sec." Namjoon walks out of the room, but not without breaking something again. The door knob looked much wrecked than before, if that was even possible.

They wonder how Namjoon hasnt fucked up yet and destroyed the whole team.

"Well," Lisa stands up and stretches her arms. "Ill be going too then."

Bambam frowns, "What?"

"I wont be back til tomorrow at most. Youre in charge, okay? Call me when something happens."

And with that, Lisa is out the door like a flash of light.

Bambam sighs, "Why does everybody have plans except me?"

Lisa gets out of her private jet after hours of traveling. She feels numb, feverish. She feels sick.

She gets into her car and it moved instantly, as they were completely rushing to match the time. She sighs, looking out the window with an unreadable expression.

She's back in Thailand.

It feels fast, maybe it really was-she didnt know-but they arrive at the cemetery in a few minutes.

She gets out, pulling the mouth mask back to cover her mouth and nose as she walks. She nears the familiar mausoleum, and she feels her heart beat faster.

She unlocks the gate with the key, and walks inside shakily.

And there he is.

Chittaphon Leechaiyapornkul (he preferred being called ten)
1992-2005

"H-hey."

Vulnerable.

At fault.

She feels like that as she takes in the whole place once again.

"Its been 7 years, ten." Lisa sounds out of breath, "Seven fucking years."

She feels like breaking down. Feels like melting, feels like her best friend is staring at her too, and that alone makes her want to scream and hide.

"I miss you."

barely above a whisper, barely even audible but its there. You can feel the pain and regret, the emotion.

This happens yearly, sometimes at multiple occasions-not just the day he died-and the feeling gets a lot more unbearable every single time.

"We still havent found that dick that killed you."

Now, that one was laced with venom and anger. Despair.

"But I promise I would. I wont stop until I do. Im going to give your death justice no matter the fucking cost."

She reaches out to the headstone and caresses it. Gently, as if it is Ten himself.

Somehow, it really is.

Then Lisa stands up, and without a second look walks out of that place and into her ride, where theyd take her back to the jet.

Lisa doesnt like crying.

Doesnt like the after feeling. The sticky, wet, pathetic feeling. She only cried a few times in her life, with reasons you wouldnt quite expect.

The jet takes off, and they were quickly on their way to Florida, where a meeting would take place.

She looks out the window, in awe of the clouds and how beautiful it looks. its a dream for her, to be able to do this-stare outside a plane-but under different circumstances. As if.

But deep deep down, theres still hope. Somewhere inside her heart, lost and waiting to be found. It will never disappear to be honest. Its a part of her.

Well, whoever she was.

She ties her hair up into a tight ponytail before standing up and walking to the wall with mirrors.

Her hair looks pretty, but is honestly so damn unhealthy. She's planning to change the color soon, thinking about a shade that will still give off that vibe.

Her phone buzzes constantly from her pocket and she takes it out, seeing texts from Namjoon and Bambam. She ignores it, looking back at the mirror instead. This time, looking directly in her eyes.

She doesnt recognize it.

Doesnt recognize those eyes.

And the things, thoughts rather, inside it.

And she feels scared.

But you know whats scarier?

She doesnt care.

She doesnt care at all.

She's tired.

So she's not gonna do anything.

Because what difference would it make?

after everything shes been through, everything shes lost, its only a matter of time before she gets used to the feeling of it all.

she'll just embrace it.

at least its consistent. pain has been the only consistent thing in her life, so might as well just take it with open arms, right?

🔫