Dreams in the Distant Sky

Chapter 15 - Threat

Kaya pov:

I let out a deep sigh as I stood leaning against the compound wall of the Art House while resting my chin in one hand. I looked out onto the forest behind the Art House, my mind filled with hazy thoughts.

I had been in a daze ever since I returned from Lord Sil's room. I couldn't think straight, I didn't feel like talking to anyone and I just wanted to be by myself. However, everyone had fussed over the wound I had on my arm and worried over the red hand print marks I had on my throat and they had asked me a million questions on it which I obviously passed off uncomfortably. Hale was especially concerned about it and he had dragged me away to give me some relief from the burning pain I felt from the marks on my throat with a cold cloth.

After Hale had rewrapped the cut on my arm and the red marks on my throat, I had excused myself from his room so I could have some time alone.

I had been pondering about what I did ever since I came to stand here by myself. I suppose wanting to comfort someone who was in pain or felt lonely – which I had did many times before with my friends and family – wasn't quite out of the ordinary. But doing it with Lord Sil was completely unexpected. Why I did so with a stranger, with someone who was completely off limits no less, I have no idea.

Okay, it's not that I didn't have any idea as to why I did that. Since the assassination attempt on Lord Sil and the help I had offered the next day, I felt closer to him. I felt the need to offer something to him – something that no one else could and something that could change the expression of loneliness and disappointment in his eyes to at least a little bit of serenity and contentment.

Besides, this feeling wasn't entirely new to me. It was similar to what I had felt when I dated people back in my world. The desire to care for someone because they were considered important, because their actions and behavior were praiseworthy and adorable and because you wanted to do things that could make them feel happy and loved and possibly, be loved by them in return.

I liked Lord Sil – not as a Supreme, not as a lord and most definitely not as the Absolute Lord. I liked him for one man. For the kind, gentle and vulnerable man he was on the inside. And surprisingly enough, I didn't feel awkward about these feelings like I usually would have with anyone else.

Well, I still didn't know enough about who Lord Sil was on the inside but I think I did know at least a little after the unguarded moments I had spent with him. The open dislike he had for those around him, humans and Supremes alike, the feeling of insecurity that he showed when he was asleep, the occasional distant looks he had in his eyes when he looked out of his study window and the vulnerability he showed when he regained consciousness after holding out for so long with the pain of the wound on his chest made me want to pamper him and give him what he never had. There was also gentleness with which he held me when he drank my blood, the warmth of his body when we were in close proximity and the immeasurable depth of his eyes that drew me to him greatly.

The sense of care and affection I had for him, that seemed to be constantly growing, was so much stronger than what I had felt before for anyone else who could pose as a potential boyfriend.

I wanted to love Lord Silas.

I shut my eyes and rubbed them with my thumb and first two fingers. I let out a sigh as well feeling sort of burdened by the turbulence in my heart and very tempted to somehow block the emotions from pricking at my conscience. I also felt more homesick than I had ever felt in my entire life. I longed to see my family – my mother, my father and my little brother. I longed to see Prof. Michael, Sarah, Jason and all my other lab mates at my internship. I even wanted to see the plump landlady of my apartment complex who often shared her homemade sweet buns with me.