[SAD]
The sun shines through the drapes, hitting your face, causing you to squirm under the comforter. You pull at the edges of the blanket and pull it over your head. You turn your head and see his blissful face sleeping next to you. A smile falls across your lips. He slowly opens his eyes.
"Morning beautiful," he smiles sleepily back at you, pulling you into his chest. You nuzzle your head under his chin and feel his arms wrap tighter while he holds you. You sigh and kiss his warm, bare chest. Suddenly, he jumps out of bed and pulls you over his shoulder, spinning you in circles.
"Harry! Babe, I’m dizzy," you laugh happily while you twirl in his grasp. He pulls you down and sets you on your feet in front of him. He looks deep into your eyes, moving strands of hair from out of them. You remember how much time is left. He leans in slowly and gently carresses his lips against yours. You smile under his kiss and feel his hot breath flow down your throat. Your lips tangle in a passion filled kiss, lustful and deep. His hot tongue laps at your lower lip, making your ever so broken heart beat faster.
"Harry, I’m going to miss you…" you mumble sadly in between kisses.
"Don’t say that, you’ll see me again soon," Harry grins, trying to stay postive, although sadness starts to fill his eyes. “We’ll always be together."
"I love you," tears streamed down your cheeks as you envision the next year without him. Without him laying next to you while you sleep. Without his goodnight kiss. Without him hugging you from behind and kissing your neck as you make breakfast. No more. No more husky morning voice. No more late night lullabies. No more passion filled nights, or holding hands under the moon.
"I love you more," he pulls your hips into his, and kisses your exposed neck.
You watch as he packs his suitcase and heads for the door. Silent tears stream down your face as you watch his every move from across the room. He grabs for his coat and scarf and puts them on. Turning to face you, you see his blood red eyes are filled with tears too. You gasp a bit, shocked at his sadness. A cheerless grin appears on his face as he drops his bags and meets you halfway across the room.
"Remember, the front door is always open, always…" You mutter into his curls as he picks you up in a hug. Sniffling hopelessly, he gasps for air through all the sobs. You pull away to see his face. “Please, don’t be sad. Please. I can’t leave you like this," you start to cry harder.
"Then, then don’t leave," He starts to see a glimmer of hope, “come with me." He sets you down and grabs your hands within his and holds them tight. You smile but tell him that you can’t. He looks down, the same sadness in his eyes once again. “Then, I guess this is goodbye," he mutters lovingly.
"It’s not goodbye. It’s see you soon," You pull his chin up and kiss his tears away.
"Yeah," he smiles as he kisses you the last time. He turns to the door and grabs his bags. He flashes you a smile filled with despair as he slowly pulls the door shut behind him. It closes.
Weeks go by without him. Each minute a growing pit of endless depression. Nothing feels right without Harry. It’s a world without smiles, love, hope. It’s nothing. You haven’t spoken for a few days now. But you assume he’s just busy performing and touring as usual.
As you sit on your coach late on a Sunday night, you change the channel to gossip news. Words flash across the screen. Words you never wanted to hear again. Deja vu all over again. Suddenly, the phone rings next to you. You answer quickly.
"It’s not true, I promise," the familiar voice pleads frantically. Harry’s voice sounds panicked and distraught. But, you can’t help but see the words flashing across the TV screen and think otherwise.
"I don’t know what to say anymore Harry. You promised this wouldn’t happen again," you reply coldly, tears pinching behind your eyes.
"Don’t say anything. Listen to me. It’s not true. I love you, and only you," he starts to cry as he pleads through the phone to you.
"Then why the hell are there pictures, Harry? WHY!?" you scream as tears finally flood out. You see Harry holding another girl close, another picture to add to the piles you already have stored in the back of your mind. You see another of him and her kissing. Your heart breaks. “I’m done Harry, done. Never come back to me again. I’m done for the final time." You hang up the phone and bury your face in your hands, letting go massive sobs until you eventually fall asleep.
Moments later, a call wakes you. You answer and hear Lou panicking on the other line.
"I can’t hear you Lou! Slow down!" You say.
"It’s Harry, he’s…" Lou pauses. You hear the grief and distress in his voice as he gasps for air, “He’s…he’s shot himself dear… he’s gone…he’s really dead. He’s killed himself because he couldn’t stand his life without you. He was telling the truth. He never cheated. But, but now…he’s dead! DEAR LORD…" Lou breaks off and loud sobs fill the line. Hearing Lou cry you realize it’s true. As you hang up the phone, your heart starts to slow its beat, the empty feeling filling your heart once again. He’s gone and it’s all because of you.
You walk to your room frozen. Each step feeling like slow-motion. You pull open the drawer next to your bed and pull out the hand gun. You place is on your temple with a weak and angry smile. You turn to the mirror and see streams of warm tears falling down your face. Suddenly, the reflection changes. You see Harry in the mirror. His beautiful and pained face. His eyes full of tears and his lips shaking. You see him holding the gun to his own temple. He pulls the trigger; and just like that, he’s gone.You lurch forward, the pain of knives tearing through your stomach.
"I promised it was a see you soon, Harry." You sob into the mirror with pain. You’re hand shakes as you hold the gun next to your brain. “So… see you soon my love."
You pull the trigger. Gone
