{ 27 } This is Personal

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CHAPTER TWENTY-SEVEN

" she thought the worst feeling was being lonely— until someone she would never forget, forgot her "

"  she thought the worst feeling was being lonely— until someone she would never forget, forgot her  "

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I run my hands along the dust covered wall, making sure to carefully look through the bins. All I know right now is, whatever the hell that was down there, can't happen again. I can't let myself get distracted no matter how addicting it felt. I would bury it, along with every thing else like I've always done.

I wasn't blind to what that was— I was afraid. Of how one moment I could be furious, and then the next unable to speak a sentence without stuttering because of one person. And of course that person was Bellamy Blake. Avalon Rayne flustered by Bellamy Blake; never thought I'd think those words, let alone have it happen.

For what seems like the thousandth time, I check the halls, walking closer to Bellamy and Clarke again. But my footsteps are quiet as I slow, the two seemingly arguing in a hushed conversation.

    "You left Miller in charge of the Grounder. You must trust him," I hear Clarke's voice carry down the hall, and I grow confused as to why she would mention that.

    "You should keep him close. The others listen to him. Avalon too- they look up to her," I hear a heavy sigh accompany Bellamy's voice, and nervously play with my hands, trying not to jump into the conversation as I attempt to ignore the part about me.

     "I should keep them close? Bellamy, what's going on? You've been acting weird all day. All the rations you took?" Clarke pauses, seemingly thinking along the same lines as me.

Bellamy was going to run.

I stumble away, confused as to how Bellamy could leave Octavia, this camp he created- all behind because of Jaha. The Bellamy I know wouldn't back down, yet I know he wouldn't allow Jaha to lock him up forever or give him the satisfaction of executing him. It was almost hard to imagine camp without him.

Although, even if I can't stand him sometimes, I'd be damned if I let that actually happen.

Bellamy was just as much a part of the Ark as anyone else, committed a crime that others here have done, but would be pardoned for. Yet he might not be, just because he shot the important man that sent a hundred kids down to die.

I reach back to the end, my vision blurring, the word spinning as I yank open a door that squeaks, squinting into the sunlight. It takes a moment for my eyes to adjust, so I lift my hand to cover my eyes and squint into the forest as I suck in a breath of fresh air.

I'm in a small clearing, trees encircling me and the lake just in view. I take sharp breaths, becoming dizzy from everything.

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