Pick Me Up

'Do push ups to pick up'

"Right now?"

"Yes."

"Are you sure?"

"Yes."

"At this very moment?"

"Yes."

"Shouldn't you teach me first?"

"Yeah."

"Are you going to?"

"Nah."

I turn to Taylor. My face completely dead panned but my anxiety oozing through.

The sweaty faces of all the gym goers taunting me without even knowing it.

Apparently working on my confidence meant working on my hips, butt, thighs, arms, abs and everything I am self-conscious about.

It is also apparently, the perfect place to pick people up. Gym singles date other gym singles. And those gym singles become gym couples, and the gym males in the gym couples have gym bodies. Nice, muscly gym bodies. See what I'm getting at? Phillip goes to the gym, so if I go to the gym... Bullet Proof Plan.

Although, I'm struggling on how I'm supposed to 'pick people up' if my face is beetroot red and I can hardly get my words out with amount of panting I'd be doing. I would sound like a wheezing grandma who's taken one too many cigarettes. And that would be after only doing one push up.

"I still don't see what my body has to do with picking people up, I mean, I think I'll just have them from how angelic my voice is." I try to compromise. I'll do anything to not do anything- here at the gym.

I'm not gym ready, I have a pair of basketball shorts on and a PJ top on which reads 'Huh! What? I didn't hear you, I was too busy being awesome'. I have my classic jaws towel which is perfect for a beach - but a gym? Not so much.

"You're Australian, your voice isn't angelic." He deadpans, getting tired of my attempts to avoid his 'trainings'. Okay, he has a point.

"And plus - guys look at your body first, if we like what we see, then we might decide to listen to what you have to say." He enlightens.

"So you're saying that the guy has to want to know me?" That sounds ridiculous.

"Yeah, precisely really."

"That's silly, I don't judge someone based on their looks, I want to get to know them, people are interesting." I try to defend the good people in the world on behalf of myself.

"Yeah but not everybody is you." He takes a moment, as if imagining a world where everybody was like me. "Thank god."

Ha. Ha. Ha

"So now to pick people up." He cheers, his eyes scanning the room for potential targets, lingering on the females for a bit too long.

Not able to help myself, a great pun comes to mind. "I hope you mean talking because I'm not in the mood for weights today." Bazinga.

I bring my hand forward and hang it there for a while, waiting for the rewarding high five, which I - personally - feel like I deserve for that one.

An overly-cheesy grin on my face and a few more seconds of non-movement from Taylor's side, I keep it hanging, waiting. When all too quickly, a soft skin to skin contact happens. His palm touching mine, in a light high five.

With a boyish grin on his face. "I'll give you that." And that compliment makes this entire experience a whole lot better.

Now with my confidence 'out of the roof', I saunter towards a hulk sized look-a-like just finishing some chin ups. It's weird how one successful joke can make you feel on top of the world.