Piercing Hearts (Len & John Pearce/Justice Crew Fanfic)

Chapter 13: Painful Memories

* John’s POV *

“It was a good ride, Peter Pan. But the pixie dust ends here.”

 This bit has been ringing in my ear for the past 15 hours, even if I tried shaking it off my thoughts, wondering about something else. It had also been keeping me up at night as listening to slow music or counting sheep didn’t even do any justice. I was literally up and thinking about Kayla and what she could have been doing right now, dreading every image that came popping in my head.

I knew Kayla too well, and I hated how I couldn’t be there to comfort her. After yesterday’s lunch, I knew it wouldn’t be the same anymore. I had officially lost my Tinkerbelle.

Guess I wasn’t in the right mind for moving on with another girl, when in fact, I was the whole reason why she left because I told her to follow her dreams. Getting into a uni was something I know she had planned a long time ago, and I felt guilty that it would be because of me why she wanted out of that, but it just didn’t work out for her anymore, which is why another reason she came back. Although I knew it wasn’t big as how she went back for me.

It’s not that I didn’t have real feelings for the girl. I did, even if people do not believe me after what happened now. In fact, I don’t think Kayla would ever look at it like that again. After Joanna, I may have played along with other girls because of temptation, but those didn’t level up when it was Kayla.

I must admit, I made a huge mistake – for pushing her out of my life, for letting her go, even if she wanted to compromise and stay in Sydney, but most of all, for breaking her heart again and again. Perhaps this was what karma has done to me, making me realise when it is all too late.  

It was as if I had woken up from a deep sleep, realising all these and regretting what I’ve done. To everyone who had surrounded me. I know I didn’t even deserve Joanna with me all these times, but after yesterday, the girl hasn’t left me as I turned toward the other side of the bed, where Joanna was sleeping peacefully.

I guess I may have tired her out from comforting me the whole night, despite the fact we may have broken up. Instead of choosing to leave and get angry at me for breaking her heart once again, she stayed and that meant a lot to me, more like crushed me more into pieces of how badly I treated her. For one, cheating on the girl when she didn’t deserve it the first… and the second time. But she had let it past her and decided to stay with me. To make sure I was alright when evidently, she wasn’t.

Sighing, I stood up from the bed and tucked her in, placing pillows all around Joanna as I dressed up, heading out. I didn’t know where to go, but I know I wanted to be alone to think.

Guess I still wasn’t in the right mind for leaving so abruptly, leaving my phone out to eliminate anyone from coming and finding me as I leave the house at three in the morning, driving out to wherever it leads me.

***

“Fancy seeing you here.” I heard a familiar voice as she sat down beside me, despite the fact how much she hated me from our last conversation. Still she chose to possibly forget about it and let it past.

I nodded, though that has only been our conversation as ten minutes had passed by. No one talked. The only sounds we could hear were crickets and our breathing. The whole city down below were peaceful to watch as the lights covered the whole area. It was beautiful.

 “I’m sorry.” We both chanted at the same time as she smiled first as I did too. Though I knew, mine was a bit forced, only because I didn’t want her to feel that I didn’t mean the apology after I’ve done to people who have been only trying to get into my circle and love me.