The Story of How I Died

Chapter 2: A Broken Heart

My heart is crushed could things get any worse? Sadly it could. A few days after Haley left my house, I was helping Dylan to ask Haley out if Haley and Michael ever broke up. He kept talking on how he wants this to be perfect and shit. I felt like I was drowning and nobody wants to help. When we came back to school I pretended everything was okay. My friends Michelle, Odessa, Anna, Lily, Maddie and Jade know about what Haley has done. Every time Haley comes up to me and talk to me all my friends would glare at her. 

I kept it all inside. How I felt about this complete mess. I was basically dying inside and no one could hear me scream. I cried a lot at night. I never thought I would care so much about one guy. Maybe it was different with my other crushes but I don't really know anymore.

Every time Haley would talk to me I would get really annoyed. It's so hard talking to her every single day and she has no idea how much she hurt me. I love Haley to death but this has been hurting me pretty bad. I kept lying to her and say everything was fine and I was cool with them dating. I kept telling her that until she was convinced. I would shout and say how cute of a couple they would be. Everyday I was slowly giving up. 

Until one day, Haley broke up with her boyfriend Michael over text but, for a completely different reason. She thought it was awkward between them since they started dating. Michael went to a different school but still, who the fuck would break someone up over text? That's just cruel. I gave Haley a lecture on how wrong it was she did it over text. 

I talked to Dylan that Haley broke up with Michael. He was so happy. Yet I was so hurt. So that was the week Dylan was going to ask out Haley. We would text for hours on that subject. I just kept it all inside and plaster a fake smile on my face. 

That week my friends Michelle and Jade convinced me I would talk to Haley on how this made me feel. I wanted Michelle to be there with me because I always feel comfortable. I was pretty confident I thought I could do it. But when the time came, it was a complete mess. 

The day before Dylan was going to ask out Haley I talked to her. I know, I know. I have pretty bad timing with things but I have thought about long and hard. That morning i talked to Haley, I had no idea what to say. Michelle was with 2 other girls and talking with them a few feet away from Haley and I. But really she was watching us. 

"Hey Haley can I talk to you about something?" I say to her. Sweat drips down the back of my neck and my head starts pounding pretty bad. I felt like I was about to burst into a million tears. 

"Yeah of course you can talk to me." Haley said and put a smile on her face, yet her eyes were getting suspicious. 

"Okay so you know.... You know that about.... About you and..." I could not find the right words to say and I was talking like a complete idiot. My eyes were burning and Haley was giving me a curious look and a sort of pitiful look, she must have saw my eyes getting red. So then, I lost it.

"You about you and Dylan? That has been hurting me so much! I am hurt pretty bad. And I have been keeping it in inside me for awhile and..." I start crying and sobbing. I look over at Michelle and she gave me a pitiful look. I turn back to Haley. 

"I'm so sorry Isabelle. I never knew that hurt you." Haley said as she looked down at the ground. Ouch. That hurt. What the fuck? It's kind of obvious that it hurt me pretty bad. 

My friend Maddie came over to me. Shit. Not now. She stood across from us and saw the tears in my eyes. 

"Oh my god... What happened? Are you alright? Are you alright? Are you okay?" Maddie was in shocked of my tears and gave me a big hug. 

"I'll talk to you later." I tell her.

"But, are you okay? Wha- what?" Maddie says  in confusion.

"I'll talk to you later I promise okay?" I say more sternly.

"Okay, feel better." She gave me a bigger hug and walked away. I felt kind of bad for sending her away but I got to deal this problem with Haley. And only Haley. I look at Haley and her expression was blank. 

"It hurt me so much Haley. It hurt me a lot!" I felt like there was nothing more to say but inside there was a million things to say to me. 

"I'm sorry Isabelle. I am so sorry." she says. Haley says that over and over again until the words lost its meaning. I just stare at the ground and cry. The bell rang. I stare back at Haley.

"I gotta go..." I say and shove my way through the crowd to get to math class. I wonder what Haley is thinking. Is she really sorry? What's going to happen now? Did I just make the worst mistake of my life telling her about how I feel? As these thoughts swarming in my head. I was just about to reach the door. And I saw Dylan. I was like, SHIT! I quickly hid my face and ran into the classroom. I sat in my desk and cried. I look up and I see Michelle, Odessa, Anna, and Lily hovering over me. 

"Are you okay?" Michelle asks.

I just shake my head and get up and leave the room. I went to the restroom and washed my face. My head is pounding really bad now. I look in the mirror and my face was blotchy, my nose was red and runny, my eyes look like a thousand more tears are going to come out. I run back to class. I sit in my desk and don't bother looking up. 

I did the morning warm up quietly and avoided any eye contact with anyone. I can tell my friend's eyes starring at me and I can feel their presence right behind me. 

"Alright class, you will be in groups of four's to work on this problem." Mr. Kent, my math teacher says. I didn't feel like being in a group. But Michelle, Anna, and Ilanna wanted to be with me. I just went along with it. We formed a small group, Michelle sat next to me, Anna and Ilana sat across from me, and I just put my head down and didn't say a word. I could hear talking but I couldn't make out what they were saying. Everything was a blur to me now. I look up and see everyone's eyes on me. 

"Okay... Hello." I say awkwardly and we all start laughing. '

"I just feel so bad." said Michelle.

"It's okay." I say reassuringly. 

For the rest of the day I avoided Haley. I skipped lunch and hung out with Jade and her friends. After school I was listening to some depressing music and I look at my phone Haley texted me. Shit, I thought. 

Haley: I am soooooo sorry Isabelle, and I'm sorry I couldn't say this to your face, I just couldn't do it. But I'm really sorry. 

I scoff seriously? Wow.If this is the way she wants to do it then, fine. 

Isabelle: You hurt me so much Haley.

Haley: But right when you told me all those things, I am NOT going to say yes to Dylan anymore.

We got into a huge fight. I kind of expected it anyways. We were fighting for hours and I was just crying. So then I finally ended the fight and I went to bed. I didn't do my homework, I basically did nothing. I shut everyone out that day. That night I started thinking, what the hell is going to happen tomorrow? Probably just a bunch of shitty, useless, drama. It's going to be disastrous. I started crying my heart out until I fell asleep thinking of what tomorrow brings.