Beyond the black lights

Chapter 11

The day passed as quick as the thunder. I know now that Aamir is here, he's around but this time he's not with me. I began to believe the idea of losing him as a lover, friend and ...

I as everyday feel depressed, I go for a walk and listen to music. I'm not that sensitive but he put me down. That guy was my first lover, I mean it deep down from my heart. Yes, when I was with him, I always felt happy but unfortunately everything happened was like nothing happened. I began to strengthen myself by believing that what happened was the best for me. (Walking in the streets with no specific direction is like a kid losing his mom because of stalking something he loves) I no longer met Aamir.

Days were passing and I was imagining him in everything I do, I always asked myself if it was my fault or his? I wished someone comes and tells me what are his feelings right now? If he's okay? Or not? If that girl will be his future wife or just a friend? Should I take the step and go back to him? Or should I keep silent as life goes on? Oh!

I went to a local library where youth always go there for reading or gaining knowledge. It was my first time to visit such a place. Wow it's huge filled with books. Despite the fact I don't like reading, but I'll try to gain knowledge. At the end of the day I felt really good and relieved. I decided to go there every Saturday since this was my free day. Actually, that what really happened, I began to go there every Saturday and there I met a nice guy who also go there at the same time. 

I remember the first day we talked when we both needed the same book, and when he said: I don't mind sharing. Then we both shared it and by that way we became friends! At first we met at the library but then we began to meet outside, we are also at the same club. So, sometimes we meet whether in the library or at the club. The week passed as quick as the storm till the day I again met him- Aamir- at the library. I know Aamir is unlike me he loves reading but I didn't know that I will meet him after those days and where at the library? What a Fate! 

He sat on the table which was next to me on a chair which was pointing to me, when I saw him I quickly looked at the book. I felt butterflies in my stomach and a heat in my face due to the shyness you can say. That guy kept on looking at me. I stood up and went to search for a certain book, he came after me he stood behind me, while I was getting the book out of the shelf he held it with me and said: I didn't know that you love reading. I looked at his eyes, left the book in his hand then went back to my seat he came after me saying: why aren't you answering me? I said in a low voice: because it's as simple as that. Then my new friend arrived I left Aamir on the table and took my friend outside. Aamir sat on the table he covered his face with his hands.My friend and I went to the club. He asked me about what happened at the library but I didn't want to talk so I changed the topic.

One day at night, Aamir called me. I felt hesitated answering him so I didn't, or I couldn't. After 3 missed calls without answering he sent me a message saying:

 "Why? Why have we been like that? I've been through bad things after the day I got away from you. That decision wasn't easy for me as u think but I had to ... I don't know what should I say because whatever damn words I will say I know you won't believe me. Ayla forgive me, I know that you hate me now, you don't want to see me, hear my voice I know I hurt you a lot but you don't know anything yet ... please forgive me, forgive me for the last second I'll call you my beautiful lady, forgive me my beautiful lady."

I read the message and was like? What does he mean by the last second? I sent him a message saying: Aamir where are you? We need to talk? He sent me back : I'm at our place the one where I showed it to you. After reaching the place, I found him on theground relying on the tree. I stopped for a second then went to him but what Ifound was different somehow; I screamed Aamir!