Some Kind of Recovery

:: Chapter Four

:: Chapter Inspiration::

:: Alone | Heart ::

'Til now, I always got by on my own

I never really cared until I met you

And now it chills me to the bone

How do I get you alone?

How do I get you alone?

x-x-x

The hands on the clock above the bar slowly moved around in circles. At last count, it had been three hours, forty -three minutes and twenty seconds since she had gotten the page to make her way down to the ER. That meant it had been three hours, seventeen minutes and twenty seconds since she stormed out of the hospital in the middle of her shift, in the middle of a tragedy.

She knew the facts. She was a doctor for crying out loud. The only reason they hadn't given up on trying to bring Meredith back was because she was one of their own and there would potentially be a lot of fall out for the hospital because they let the Ellis Grey's daughter die on their watch. If it had been anyone else coming through that door, they would have given up twenty minutes after they were brought in.

And because she was a doctor, she knew that there could have been many different reasons for Meredith not waking up, she could have all sorts of brain damage, considering nobody knew how long she had been under the water until Derek pulled her out and started CPR. By the time he had pulled her out, there very well could have been irreversible damage done and Meredith just wouldn't be Meredith anymore.

That thought made her shudder. She and only known Meredith for seven months and she was the most important person in her life. She had never felt a connection like the one they had with anyone else.

And then her dark mind started to drift to what her headstone would say and who would be there.

Thankfully, Burke pulled the stool next to her back slightly as he moved to sit down on it.

"Come say goodbye to your friend," He had told her and that had been the final nail in the head, they were about to give up on her. Burke's pager beeped from his waistband and he stood, offering his hand to her which she took shakily.

x-x-x

Pushing open the door to the trauma room, her breathing stopped for a second. Meredith lay on the trauma table, Dr Bailey leaning over her slightly as she pressed down on the younger woman's chest, forcing blood around the body. A large tube was taped to the side of her mouth, forcing air into her lungs, but the tube just made the already tiny woman look smaller, if possible. Her skin was grey, a sickly colour and Cristina was just glad she hadn't seen her earlier when she had just been pulled out of the water, she could only imagine the shade of blue she had been caused by the hypothermia she was no doubt suffering from.

Miranda stepped away from the table as Cristina entered, finally giving up on the woman that lay in front of her. They had been trying for too long, she was far too gone at that point, the damage undoubtedly irreversible at this point.

Her legs were about to give up on her so Cristina grabbed onto the first thing she could, Meredith's feet, which were covered in several layers of blanket."Try again," she muttered out. When nobody moved to follow through with her demand, she shouted it much louder, catching the attention of everyone in the room, "Try again!"

"One more round of A.C.L.S drugs?" Bailey asked cautiously, glancing at the chief who had a hand covering his eyes. Briefly, he looked up at her and she had to ignore the water forming in her bottom eyelid, "One more."