I love you... - a Hidekane fanfic

Sadness

Hide's POV

I tossed and turned.

"ken...?"

he slit down his wrists...screaming and crying.

"HELP ME HIDE!!!"

"yeah, me and my boyfriend live here."

"WHAT DID YOU DO?!"

his face was ghostly pale and his eyes were half open.

his chest wasn't moving.

his arms, which had gone purple, hung limply by his side.

his body....just....hanging there...

"NO!!!" I gasp, bolting upright. looking around me I realise I'm in my room.

"huh? was it just a bad dream?" I mutter to myself, running my hands through my hair.

dringggggggggg.

looking over at the desk my phone is glowing and vibrating. i throw off my bed covers and jump up, banging my head. huh. Kaneki would be laughing his ass off right now.

if he was here.

"ow!" I rub my forehead. tears brim my eyes as i look at the trash can and memories of last night flood my mind.

"ken....i'm sorry...if only I had gotten there sooner....." i hear my voice break and i feel like i'm about to cry.

 the phone abruptly vibrates again and i look at the screen. its the hospital! I almost drop my phone in my haste to answer it.

"hello?" a lady's voice answers.

"hi! thank god! I...uh, I mean, hello...Hide Nagachika speaking." I say, trying to sound calm as possible.

"ah, hello Hide." she says. "I understand the person you are in a relationship with was admitted here last night. what's his name?"

"Kaneki ken. How's he doing?!" i ask urgently.

"hang on a minute. let me ring the ward he's in." then i hear a beep as the phone is put on hold. the 5 minutes it was on hold were probably the most intense moments of my life.

"hello?" once again a lady answers. she had a gruff, scratchy voice.

"hi, I'm calling To check on Kaneki." i say with anticipation.

"Kaneki ken?"

"mhm."

"oh, he's not in the ward right now." my throat feels dry. is he....

"he's in surgery." she interrupts." he was in critical condition last night."

"what?!" i yell. " can i come see him?"

"you are welcome to sit in the waiting room but visiting times are strictly from 2 till 4." my heart sank as i looked at the clock seeing it was only 9:00. "and then he'll still be recovering from the anaesthetic."

"okay. thank you." i manage to whisper out and hang up.

(time skip, still Hide's POV)

i sit on the hard hospital chair, my head in my hands. i begin to cry uncontrollably. All i want is to see Kaneki. i feel someone tap me on the shoulder.

"You're Hide Nagachika, i take it?" a nurse asks softly.

"yes."

"we have some....how do i put this....bad news, I'm afraid." she says, looking sad.

"if you'd follow me please."

she leads me down a hallway into a room that looked a lot like a doctors office. i sat down.

"well?" i asked anxiously.

"do you want to know the...details?"

"yes!" i yell hastily, not caring about what she thinks.

"okay. Kaneki, took a turn for the worse. he complained that he was in pain. doctors found he was bleeding from his...private region... and had been for at least a day, the wound had started to close."

"what are you saying??"  i push.

"he was raped. were you aware of this?" she questioned hesitantly.

"No! by who?" oh my god....oh my god...

"he wasn't in a fit state to name his attacker. he recovered from the anaesthetic fairly quickly, and was acting normal, so when we found out he had been raped police came to question him.  he started screaming and thrashing when police asked him about it and he started harming himself, so we had to sedate him and restrain him." she hesitantly told me.

I feel defeated, like i cant move.

"i need to see him. please." i beg her.

"follow me." she briskly walked out of the room and into an elevator, pressing the 3rd floor. as the elevator moves up my stomach lurches as i stand in shock from what i just heard.

we arrive in a ward.

"he's not in the best state right now. are you sure about seeing him?" the nurse asked me.

"yes."

"okay then. he might still be sleepy from being sedated." she warns me, leading me through a curtain.

Kaneki was pale, topless and sweaty. he had an IUV in his hand, and was attached to numerous other contraptions that i don't know the names of. he was breathing heavily and looked flushed. his neck and arms were covered in bandages with blood seeping through. he was tied to the bed. i guess that's what the nurse meant by 'restrain'.

"ken", i whisper out, cautiously stepping towards him.  sitting down by the bed i brush the hair away from his face. he slowly, but surely, opened his eyes!

"ken! thank god!" i burst into tears right then and there. i feel him grunt and struggle against his restraints to try and wrap his arms around my neck, so i lean down to him and gently kiss his lips. god I'm so happy he's okay.

"i'll leave you two alone for a bit." a timid voice says. i watch Kaneki blush as he realises the nurse saw us kissing.

when we are alone i cup his face in my hands.

"babe, do you remember anything?"

i watch with sadness as his eyes cloud over with tears.

" i need to tell you something. Eric. He...he...i..." he starts to cry.

"i know. i wont force you to talk about it, the nurse told me." his eyes open wide. "so it was eric who did it?" i question.

"yeah..." he whimpers out.

i feel anger course through me.

"Eric." i whisper through gritted teeth.

You're fucking dead.