Tw( Depressing thoughts,. If you are triggered by these please read at your own risk. It was very hard for me to write this. Well only Tyler's part)
Tyler's POV
Why am I alive right now? I should be dead. I haven't eaten in two months.
You don't deserve to live. Your life is worthless. No one wants you here. Everyone hates you Tyler don't you see. You should've just jumped when you had the chance.
Shut up shut up shut up shut up. You're not real. You're just a voice in my head.
Tyler look for the scalpel. You know if you just grab it then I'll leave. TYLER JUST RUN THE SCALPEL ACROSS YOUR ARM AND SAY "GOODBYE TO THE EARTH AND YOUR WORTHLESS LIFE".
LEAVE ME ALONE. I'M STRONG. I CAN DEFEAT YOU. YOU'RE JUST A VOICE AND THAT ALL YOU EVER BE. FEAR WONT BE THE DEATH OF ME.
"Tyler? Are you okay? I heard you yelling." Josh said with a concerned voice.
"Yeah I'm fine."
"Tyler you aren't fine, you're so very far from fine."
"Josh look I know I haven't eaten in awhile but i really am fin-"
"TYLER, JUST STOP WITH THE LYING. YOU ARE NOT FINE YOU NEED HELP BUT YOU WONT LET ME HELP YOU." Josh said as he began to break down and cry.
"Tyler. I care about you but you won't let me. I try to help you but all you do is lie straight to me face and I don't know how long until you- until you actually try to-" Josh could barely get the words out of his mouth. He thought he wouldn't have to use those words again.
"J-Josh I-I'm so sorry." I could barely get these words out without feeling like a complete failure.
"Tyler, I think it's best if we don't speak until you get yourself together. I can't be with someone so broken. Not again."
"J-Josh, Wh-what are you saying?"
Josh let out a big sigh " Tyler I'm saying that once you finally learn how to be the person you were when I met you then we could go back to being friends. But until then I don't want nothing to do with you. Bye Tyler."
"J-Josh p-please don't leave me alone with me thoughts" wow I never heard my own voice so broken before.
There was silence.
"D-d-don't leave me alone....please"
"Tyler I said goodbye"
And just like that he was gone. He was just another memory to stay with me. Why couldn't I keep people around with me, am I that bad to be around.
Yes you are. See even Josh don't want anything to do with you. Tyler you're too broken and you always will be broken.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Few days later.
Josh's POV
I shouldn't never have left him, I'm such an idiot what's wrong with me.
I should go see him, say sorry. He probably doesn't want to see me. I probably made him mad. Was Tyler mad at me....yeah probably. Tyler deserve better. But I could help him
Okay after a few hours of me debating if I should call I shall call Tyler cause he don't deserve this. He deserves to be happy.
"Hello?" A woman picked up the phone "Um hi this is Josh is Tyler there?" "Tyler, he's umm not here" "Oh where did he go?" "Listen I'm really busy right now but it was nice talking" "No please just tell me if Tyler is ok-" I was cut off by the phone hanging up, it was just silence now.
Tyler must be mad at me. I'd be mad at me, screw it I'll just go over there and see Tyler myself even if he don't wanna see me I need to say sorry.
Holy ToLeDo it's cold, that's alright I just need to see Tyler. To see if he's okay. I can't bare with myself knowing I said all those things to Tyler. What will Tyler do when he sees me? Will he be happy or mad or sad or not.
Hmm I didn't realize I passed Tyler's house while caught up in my thoughts. Okay Josh just go up there knock on the door and ask for Tyler. That's simple I could do it, I could do it, I can't do it.
Deep breath. I'm ready; once I got up on Tyler front door I kinda blacked out and I didn't realize that Tyler was standing right in front of me.
"Josh? Josh? Josh are you okay?" It was Tyler's voice. I snapped out of it when he slapped me.
"Josh what are you doing here?"
"Tyler I'm sorry. I shouldn't have said those things to you in the hospital. I was mad cause I just wanted to know the truth but I pushed it and I got you mad and I'm- im just sorry Tyler, can you forgive me?"
"Josh.....I don't know what to say but I'm not mad. I was just disappointed that you didn't realize this earlier."
"Tyler I love you and I truly care about you but I don't know if you feel the sam-" I was interrupted by Tyler lips hitting with mine.
His warm hands were placed on my cheeks and my arms were wrapped around his waist. Time froze and it was like something out of a movie. I wanted this moment to last forever. But sadly it ended..... too soon.
As Tyler pulled away I finally opened my eyes and realized that Tyler wasn't even there. I was still laying in my bed but I felt like he was there with me.
I got up and felt like crying. But no tears came out, I check my phone and Tyler's name ran across my phone.
Tyler: Josh I'm sorry. I know this is out of nowhere but I need to see you.
My heart. It felt warm knowing that Tyler still cared I need to see him.
Once I got up and took a shower I texted him back saying "Yeah can you meet me at the little cafe shop down the street?"
Tyler: sure. Thank you for replying Josh. I missed you.
Me: I missed you too Ty.
My heart was racing. It's been three days since Tyler and I had that fight in the hospital.
Finally I came across the cafe that I was gonna meet up with Tyler. I got into the cafe and seen Tyler way at the back of the cafe, of course that little bean don't really like the public but I made him come through.
"Hey Tyler" "Hey Josh"
It was a little awkward cause when I guess I dreamed about kissing Tyler; that's all I could think of now.
I just want him to know how I felt.
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A/N: do you guys like the long chapters? If you do please tell me and I'll write them longer.
