Marriage By Contract

Chapter 31: Baby?

It was as if someone yanked my heart right out of my chest and sunk it to the bottom of the ocean. Should I be happy or sad? He has feelings for someone else. Wait, but then shouldn't it be me. He did say he liked me when we talked. And I possibly couldn't forget about that kiss. What did it even mean? My head swarmed with questions. I felt delighted but sad at the same time. It can't be me he has feelings for. That kiss was nothing more than a make out session with him. But we weren't even making out. But I bet Jason thought otherwise. I pondered how many girls he kissed that way. Jessica was definitely one of them and I happen to be in there too. My first kiss was nothing more than any other kiss with Jason. I felt disappointed.

"But enough about me, I want to ask you questions."

I felt like I was being choked. "Sure," I tried to sound happy.

"Did you ever have feelings for Derek?"

I looked into Jason's brown orbs. Man, they were gorgeous. But his question threw me off. It felt like every question these days have been throwing me off. Did I have feelings for Derek? I asked myself the question. I was taking too long to answer and the hurt behind Jason's eyes made me feel guilty. But what for?

It's only fair I'm honest with him. Afterall, he was the same with me.

"I definitely thought he was charming. Really good looking but not as handsome as you-"

I covered my mouth with my hands. Did I just say that out loud? Great, now he knows I find him attractive. Shit, I've messed up.

Jason didn't even have the reaction I expected. He just chuckled and kept on staring at me. I know for a fact my face was turning red. I grabbed the covers and hid under it. A childish act, but it was the only thing I could think of at the moment. This large piece of fabric over my head blocked Jason's view from me. I don't want him to see me. Jason tugged at the comforter but I didn't budge. 

"Lola, it's okay. I think you're cute too."

That just made it worse. Cute? He saw me as cute? I shook my head, though he couldn't see me. Jason grabbed the other side of the comforter and pulled it over his head too. Great, not only am I in bed with him, I'm also under the blanket with him too. How much more suspicious can this get? I tried turning my face away, so at least, I wouldn't be able to see him. But no, Jason had an entirely different plan in mind. He grabbed my waist and pulled me close until our noses were practically brushing against each other. The same scent I smelled on his clothes that I wore filled my nostrils. He smelled so good. Like a mixture of cologne and mint. The smell was intoxicating but in a good way.

"You see me as cute?" I asked in disbelief.

"Yeah, what's wrong with that?"

"Everything!" I stated loudly. "Not only did I call you hot in my thoughts, but I also said you're handsome out loud."

I then realized I just told him he was hot. What is wrong with me? Seriously, I should just duct-tape my mouth.

"That was embarrassing," I murmured. Jason laughed which didn't help the situation.

"Okay if you want to hear the truth, I think you're smexy."

I raised my brow in a questioning manner. "Smexy?"

"Yes," he continued. "You're smart and sexy, therefore you're smexy."

I giggled at this. "No, I'm a bitch and you know it."

Jason shrugged in a care free way. "More like sassy and a complete bad ass when you want to be."

I shook my head, not believing this. "But you called me a bitch, and I know it's true."