~ Can't You Help Me As I'm Starting To Burn? ~

Part 9

I walked out of my house, closing the door behind me.  

I didn't want to wake up Ryan.  

I was going to meet Jimmy.  

He had called me the night before and asked if I wanted to hang out.  

I instantly agreed.  

Jimmy just had this care free aura that seemed to radiate from him.  

Made me want to be the same way. 

Just forget about my problems and live in the moment. 

I walked into the coffee shop and Jimmy jumped up, running over to me.  

I grinned and hugged him tightly.  

"Bella!" Jimmy yelled.  

"Hi Jimmy!" I said with a smile.  

He put me down and led me over to a table in the corner of the shop.  

We sat down and ordered and then Jimmy sat back, looking at me. 

"So what's up? What did I do to deserve your presence." I said jokingly. 

Jimmy laughed as well. 

"Just think of yourself as lucky." He said. 

"Well thank you. I feel blessed." I said with a smile. 

"As well you should. So what's your story?" Jimmy asked. 

I stopped mid laugh. 

No one had ever asked me that so outright.  

I should've known either Jimmy or Matt would ask eventually.  

Matt.  

Great. 

I had just got him out of my head and I put him right back in there.  

"What do you mean?" I asked, trying to keep my voice from shaking. 

"Tell me about yourself. The only thing I know about you is that you're a kick ass producer and you have a boyfriend. How you got in the music industry. What your family is like. Everything and anything. I want to hear about it all." Jimmy said.  

I smile, this is a side of Jimmy I've never seen before.  

I always saw the insane, mastermind Jimmy. 

Not best friend Jimmy.  

I looked at him and I felt something I've never felt with another man.  

Trust.  

I looked into his eyes and felt like i could tell him anything. 

Like I could spill my guts and he would take me away from everything that could hurt me. 

It was a good feeling. 

But also bad. 

My problems weren't Jimmy's responsibility. 

He shouldn't have to worry about me when he has his own life to live. 

"I've loved music since I was a kid. I used to play with my brother and sister." I said with a smile.  

"I didn't know you had a brother and sister. What's their name? Where do they live?" Jimmy asked.  

"Caleb and Elizabeth. I call them Cale and Bethy. Cale is the oldest and Bethy is the second oldest, I'm the baby of the family." I said.  

I looked down. 

Thinking about them, made me miss them. 

Not thinking about them was easier.  

"His often do you see them?" Jimmy asked. 

"Its been a little over four years." I said softly. 

"What? Why so long?" Jimmy asked.  

"They live far away. With my career, I haven't had time to go see them." I said.  

"That's not right. I can tell just by the way you talk about them, that you miss them. I think you should take some time to go and visit them." He said.  

"It's complicated." I said after a moment. 

"Why dont you explain it to me then." Jimmy said, leaning back. 

I didn't say anything. 

"Well Ryan doesn't---," I tried.  

"Ah ha! So it's because of your boyfriend. They dont like him so you stay away from them?" Jimmy asked.  

I looked down. 

"Its not like that. It's just easier to stay away. It causes less drama that way." I said quietly. 

Jimmy was quiet as he looked at me.  

"I know that any guy who doesn't get along with your family, probably isn't good for you. A family knows when something is wrong. More particularly, sibilings." Jimmy said.  

I stayed quiet. 

"They just don't get along." I said quietly. 

"There has to be a reason why." He said. 

"There is." I said. 

"So why don't you tell me. Because family always comes first. They're always there, always will be." Jimmy said.  

"I know and there is a reason. You know it might be because Ryan doesn't like my family. He says they have too much influence over me. He wants me to himself." I said.  

"That is selfish and unfair. They're the ones who are going to be here when he's gone." Jimmy said.  

"I know. They just all have disagreements in the past." I said.  

"Why is that?" Jimmy asked.  

"I don't know. Its probably because they saw Ryan beat the crap out of me once when I talked to another guy. Or when he broke my wrist when I tried to hit him back. Or how I was hospitalized for two days cause of a concussion he gave me by throwing me against a wall. Any of those instances could have fueled the hatred they have for each other." I said. 

It just came out.  

I have never once, told anyone about what happens to me behind closed doors.  

Even when my brother and sister saw it first hand, i denied it. 

But sitting here with Jimmy for twenty minutes, I told it all. 

And it felt so good to tell someone about it.