Riding Rants!

The 6 Types of Coaches

coaches we've all had them (at least I hope) and we all know just how annoying some can be.

i've complied a list of some of the coaches you'll come across at least once during your riding career.

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THE BIPOLAR BFF

now I call this coach the bipolar bff because it seems like this lady is just having mood swings out of the ying-yang. 

like one lesson she's all over you and you're perfect eq

and the next it's like you've turned into a demon monkey and she hates your guts.

like WHAAAT? Excuse me? 

and usually if you're stuck with a bipolar bff as a coach you can usually tell when she's in a 'bad mood' as soon as she walks into the barn.

like right off the bat everything gets real quiet and the barn gets darker and colder 

and you're like GREEAAAT

but then the next lesson

NAAAH no biggie baby she loves you again and her mood is so good she's practically skipping down the stall aisles. 

and i'm just sitting here like honey can I get you some damn medication

because your mood swings are giving me  whip lash!

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THE SCREAMER

thank the lord that I never had a screamer as a coach

but let me tell yah I sure as hell have encountered them before (and have not been able to hear the same way since) 

now from what I've seen this lady is just straight up screaming for kicks. 

like she's teaching and her students are right in front of her and she's screaming bloody f-ing mary. 

at shows her students are in the ring and she's screaming corrections left, right and center so EVVEERRYONNEE at the goddamn show can hear her annoying voice. 

like lady please just stop before your lungs come flying out of your pie hole

these coaches also seem to be strongly opinionated and have no problem bitching you out to back them up

really

really 

loudly 

like I ain't even your student and I want to either murder you

or chop off my ears

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THE BFF

now this is probably the least annoying coach out there

and y'all who have a coach like this one 

thank your lucky stars because these coaches are one in a million!

the bff coach is basically more your friend than your coach 

your like homies, attached at the hip and it's nothing but sunshine and rainbows at the barn. 

you txt each other regularly about none riding stuff

you both spend time with each other outside of barn things (i.e Christmas parties/birthday parties/halloween parties)