There are all together 4 pieces of paper on my desk one of them is the speech I have written for blues funeral if it ever gets to it which I hope to god it won't. The other three are from the same letter. It's blues goodbye letter. She gave them to me 2 weeks ago and last night I held them close because I thought it was going to be the last thing I'd ever have to remember her by. In the letter she says she doesn't want me to cry or shout or scream while I read it...im sorry I broke all three of those rules. Blue if your reading this you are best fucking friend in the whole fucking world. I hate it that your this bad and if worse comes to worse I will never ever leave your side. I broke down last night infront of my mum.
"What do you want me to do? You never tell me what you want!" She screamed.
"I WANT TO DIE" I shouted back.
Stunned she stared at me and then said
"Oh give me a break".
This is why I hate it here she doesn't help no one apart from the roof top crew and my true friends help. I wish we could chip in for a house and live there but...
"The world is not a wish-granting factory". My god I wish it was.
