lost my head

Nine.

"You're in Atlanta! Wake up girl. We're late" I heard Cady said.

I moaned "Where are we?" I stretched out and sleepy eyes.

"Where in Atlanta's HipCamp and you have to wake up because it's 7:33 am and we have to continue our works!" she replied, even though she's getting mad, the tone of her voice still charming.

"Cady.."

I saw her shaking her head then tries to reach me from above her bed and pulling me "Come on! You're the only person in this universe who still sleeping"

"Okay okay I'll get up." I say

"Right. Away. Follow me, okay?"

"Yea I will"

~

The moment of art is in this room. They are completely quiet. Taking the silence to highlight the beauty and importance of art they are making.

"We're running out of time" Cady whispers while I mesmerize the room

"Sorry I'm checking what they're doing" I follow her walking

"Obviously, doing fun art. Alan, we have another activity tonight and don't forget we shall not call it activity, it's ruiner."

I look at her face, "What is ruiner?"

"Activities that ruining and destructing our budget of time in our works." she whispered

"Do I have to worry about it?"

"Of course we are! Instead of thinking what else we could make, we're attending in that we shall not call it activity" Cady smiles at me and sit on her chair. "I'm starting to paint so go away"

"Oh you're being mean"

"Because if I ain't, you're not leaving me." she smiled, "so go away"

I walk on the way to my side to continue my drawing. I never expected I would land a million of drawings because of a contest in this camp.

When I get bored in house, I draw. But I don't use half of my notebook in one day. Here in HipCamp, I can't believe I could do that. I also can't believe they are momentarily beautiful in my eyes. I actually opened my artistic eye because of my team. They helped me. I gained confidence because of them. Must say that the improvements in me does exists.

While I'm walking, looking at the ground somebody calls my name "Alan."

"Hi"

"Do you mind if I bring you to KV Cabin tonight?" Finn asked

I laugh at him "Sure. But for what?"

"N-nothing. I just.."

"Okay, Finn" I smiled. Then I go back to my side.

I never expected that the camp I was hoping to be part of is somewhat a charity. I can't believe I'm doing this for people I do not know.

Yet, it's fine with me. At least I have a record that I helped people. But not in a way I want to. I helped them because its a project for a camp.

"This is adorable!" Cady whispered excitedly

"W-what are you doing here?"

"Am I not allowed in here?" she asked.

I look at her hands and she's holding a brush "What makes an abstract adorable?"

"Because you made it."

"If I were me, I'd buy it." She gave me a sweet smile. A cutest smile I've seen from her.

While Cady and I tracking each other's smile, Finn speaks.

"So jeez, later tonight we have a free spirit. Some of you didn't know it, it's a party and you drink and smoke how many times you want."

"Oh my god!" I whispered looking at the ground. I never had an experience like that before. Like I said, my routine all day and night is in the house, nothing else. This is gonna be fun. It should be.

Well, of course, without Danny or Aniston it's not impossible to be more fun. Although, I don't drink and smoke and party, I am very much excited.

~

Unfortunately, I'm deranged tonight. It's not that I'm not yet ready for experiencing a party but that means I'm facing the reality again.

There's this Aniston right now who's looking at me from friendly smile to devilish eyes very quick.

It's hard to deal with mean people. We all know that. Because we all have an experience like those behaviors of individual. On the outside world, I only have one friend, who saves me everytime mean people coming to me. It's like they're punching me straight on my face when things really rough and criticism get to my heart.

But what hardly the most is the time goes by, she's the one that doing it to me. I trusted her, I saved her as much as she did and I loved her.

I don't like Aniston treating me rudely. Just because we're not friends in the beginning doesn't mean that its cool with me that she's being such so dick to me.

For once, maybe this camp will be my freedom. A better place. No judgment and all. I don't want this camp to be the next generation or subsidiary of my high school. I'm over it. I should've.

~

"Will do." I heard Finn answered to whatever Joe asked him. He looks at us, "Okay, jinx since we haven't had our open forum, can we do this tonight?"

"This..this supposed to be a fun night! Party. I mean, god. This is the best part of HipCamp." Elle say.

"Uhh, El. You can do things like this outside. I mean, music festival is not dead." Finn replied, "But open forum is once in a bluemoon."

"Got your point, bro" Tim the newbie said in a serious tone.

"Well then" Elle shrugs "what can I say?"

Finn and his signature smile towards us, heavily breaths, intertwining his hands on his lap "Let's start..with Elle?"

"As some of you don't know Elle, its me. Uhh, been attending this jinx 3 times and uhh" she sighs "where to start?"

Everyone keeps listening to her when suddenly someone burst out a laugh.

"What?" serious Elle asked to Cady. "what's so funny?"

"Nothing. It's just..you know, ever since you came here you never wear a smile."

"My parents died in a car accident with my brother before I got here..and I.." everyone surprised of what she said "I'm the only one survived so..there's no reason for me to wear that fucking smile you know?"

"Oh god, I'm sorry." Cady put her hands on her mouth in shock.

Then I know Elle. She doesn't like sugarcoating. She's straightforward. Now I know why she's all this miserable ones in our room when Cady and I do fun moments and most especially when I do stupid things she reacted like all angry way better than Finn the team leader.
I thought she's being hard on me, I thought she don't like me, I thought she's irritated at me but she's all that in the world not just in me.

"I'm sorry for what happened El" Finn said with his very sad face and creasing his forehead.

"Yeah, I should be over it. I mean, you know? I thought this blue turns to be colored if I join here but.."

"But, what? El?" Finn raised his brows.

"It turned colorful." Elle faints smile. "I was this miserable kid, sending wrath in the world for taking my family out of me.  And I met cool beautiful kids, made my life even more colorful than I expected, I made new friends, I made new family, you helped me to start over. Only if whole year is summer."

"Make it whole" I say unemotional.

She sighs "Thanks. Cheers!" holding her glass. "Jinx. Alan your next"

"Oh."