Their Deadly Design // Minho

Raven: Cranks

Newt had gone fuckin crazy. I knew he was slipping from reality but I couldn't tell how far. I was loosing my own mind after all.

The first day that they all left, Newt and I were cordial enough. We ate meals together, talked or just sat around in the Rec Room together. I had found a pack of cards but Newt and I didn't know any games so they were kind of useless. And cards didn't come with instructions or game plays either. Just to keep my hands busy, I shuffled them while Newt stared out into empty space.

I didn't remember Newt. Hell, the first time I had seen him had been out in the Scorch when we had threatened all of them but even there, in that moment, Newt didn't seem like a bad guy. He was fearless, a leader. People listened to him when he talked and went to him for advise. I got all of that off a first impression so it should have worried me more when he began to withdraw from everyone but most of all, when he began to withdraw from the only other person he might see for the next couple of days. 

Newt didn't show up for breakfast the next morning. I figured he might have slept in a little longer so I waited in the kitchen for him to come stumbling in. I didn't have anything better to do and I didn't want to go wake him either. But as eleven o'clock rolled around, I got a little nervous. I headed straight for the boys dorm.

"Hey Newt! You in there?" I called out, lightly knocking on the metal door. There was no answer. "Say something sarcastic if you can hear me." Still no response. "I'm coming in so you better be asleep and not changing or something." I grasped the door handle and pushed it open, entering the boys dorm. 

Newt was lying on his bed, fully changed in the clothes he had on yesterday. Had he moved at all since coming in here after dinner last night? His eyes were a little bloodshot but I wasn't sure if that was from lack of sleep or something else. He didn't even turn my way when I walked in and sat on his bed by his legs.

"The least you could have done was say, 'I'm alive Raven. You don't have to worry about me.'" Newt didn't smile, didn't even sigh. He just continued to stare at the ceiling. I looked up, wondering if something was up there. There wasn't. "You're creeping me out a little here Newt. Don't tell me you've lost all your marbles already."

"No but I'm going to. I can feel it." He murmured. So at least he was still coherent but it was still creepy as hell.

"How can you feel it dummy." I said, trying to joke around with him. "All you have to do is not work your brain too hard. That way the illness can't sink too far into your brain. Sounds nice right?" Newt slowly turned his head to look at me and I got this intense vibe from him.

"No matter what I do. No matter what you do, we're both going to die of this disease. We're going to be just as fucking crazy as all those cranks and there's nothing we or any of our friends can do about it." I swallowed hard.

"Well can you at least not be so morbid about it?" I asked him. "I know we're going to die but lets at least have some fun with it."

"Have fun with what!" Newt shouts, sitting up so fast that I jump up off his bed. "Why should I joke about my imminent death! Like it's something I shucking asked for! Well it's not. I didn't ask for any of this. I didn't ask to be a part of these stupid Trials. I didn't ask to become a leader in the Maze. I didn't ask to be killed!"

"Neither did I." I remind him but Newt has this far away look in his eyes, like he's not really seeing me.

"There's no point anymore. There's no point to anything." He just stared at the empty beds across from him for a little while before slowly laying back down.

"Umm.. Anyways, I came in here to ask if you were hungry. You should eat something. You barely touched the food last night." Newt didn't reply. "Newt, you need to eat." He gave no indication that he was listening to me, that he could even hear what I was saying.