Head Over Leather #Wattys2017

XXIX. Apologies and Confessions

"So I told him that it just wasn't going to work." I stare blankly at Mia as she finishes off her story with a careless shrug as if it wasn't carrying flaws that fully explained her actual problem. She raises the green beer bottle to her lips and tilts it, swallowing it's remaining contents without batting an eyelash.

"You're afraid of commitment." I muse thoughtfully, finding the straw with my red coated lips and taking a sip. Mia scowls, running a hand through her mess of blonde hair as she scans the crowd.

"If you say so." I open my mouth to argue, determined to fix whatever issue she had with being with Ryder, but she nudges my side, causing a yelp to sound out instead. I move to pinch her, but she points a black painted finger towards the two figures that have entered the house. Rachel gracefully slides off her cropped leather jacket, revealing a red, strapless top paired with a tight leather skirt. Ethan, on the other hand has chosen the more casual route with a plain white muscle shirt, black jeans and flannel tied tightly around his waist.

Ethan's eyes scan the room, lingering  a few seconds at every corner of the room. Eventually, his wandering eyes settle on me, but he remains expressionless. He momentarily turns away to Rachel, whispering something to her, before striding over to us, each confident step causing my breath to hitch.

He stops directly in front of me, Adams apple bobbing as he swallows hard, peering down at me. "Hi." I breathe out, watching as a small smile appears on his lips but disappears just as quickly.

He ignores my greeting and turns to Mia, holding out a present wrapped in black paper, which was just her style, causing a grin to spread across her face. Ethan plants a quick peck on her cheek, while she grips the present in one hand and hugs him with the other.

"Happy birthday, kid." He smirks, ruffling her hair in a teasing manner. Mia rolls her eyes, punching his arm, before side-eyeing me with an apologetic look. Ethan, following her gaze, holds out another gift that I hadn't realized he was holding. It was wrapped in a pastel blue paper with a card taped to the side and black bow sitting neatly on top. I carefully take it from him, fingers grazing the packaging in awe, wondering how amazing this boy must be to still get me a present even after everything.

"Hope you like it." He mutters under his breath and I flash him a grateful smile in response, unsure of what to say. He stays rooted to his spot for a moment with an unsure expression, hands tucked in his pockets, as we have yet another intense stare off.

"Ethan I-"

"Ethan man! Come on, I've got some cigs." I wince at the interruption of a jock who slaps Ethan on the back in greeting and motions outside. Ethan looks at me once more, disappointment flashing in his eyes, before he nods following the chestnut-haired jock outside. What I want to do is reach out for him and tell him how much I miss and love him, but I don't. Instead I'm left staring down at the gift in my hand.

"Cheer up, babe. He'll come around. I mean, he got you this right?" Mia attempts to cheer me up, but it only further deepens the disappointment rising in my chest.

"It's a birthday party. It's polite to do that." I let out a watery chuckle, sniffling as I realize my eyes have begun to water. I excuse myself from Mia, ignoring her protests and find myself leaning against the balcony on her porch, breathing in the crisp cool air of the night. I couldn't quite explain why Ethan has this effect on me and I didn't know if we were ever going to be okay. I could live with being just friends as long as I had him in some way. But there was no denying that he was hurting me far more than I was him.

"Hey there little red." My head snaps up at the sudden interruption of thoughts to find Theo beside me with a charming smile and gift in hand. "Sorry I'm a little late. Had to run out to get this." He holds up the small box, shaking it to add emphasis as I take in his appearance. His torso is covered by a blue button up that draped slightly over the top of his grey jeans and although he isn't that close to me, I can smell a fresh musky scent on him which fits his striking masculinity.