[ Him ; Her ; Hunter ; Narration ]
❧
Saturday, 11:15 pm
calling : kayden
-
"Did anyone tell you to never hang up on such a sexy guy like me?"
"I'm sexier than you."
"You wish you were. Anyways, I tied Emma to a chair so she doesn't pull out her katana on me. Let's continue our questions, shall we?"
"Fine."
"I swear to God, when I get untied, fucking hell is going to break out."
"Um.."
"What do you like to do for fun?"
"I like to um, sit down, read, or go for a swim, and play video games."
"Where do you see yourself in a couple of years?"
"Probably in jail."
"Well, we can't have that. If you're in jail, Emma is going to be all alone and sad."
"Did you snort up some cocaine before you came?"
"I don't do drugs."
"Sure you don't."
"Have you been in any relationships with anyone? Whether it's a master and sex slave relationship, regular boyfriend/girlfriend and things like that."
"I only had one night stands."
"How many?"
"Around 20 or so.."
"TWENTY? We have to make sure you didn't contract HIV/AIDS or herpes. Have you got your penis checked at the hospital yet?"
"Am I suppose to answer that?"
"Yes ."
"I am so done with my life right now."
"The result was negative."
"That's good. But a reminder, your ding-dong belongs to Emma now so don't be inserting it anywhere else."
"I'm kidding. I'm still a virgin and my dee belongs to me."
"Oh thank God. I was about to call the penis removal company and tell them to put a new one on you. And your dee belongs to Emma."
"My ears are bleeding."
"Let's move on. How many children do you plan to have?"
"One boy and one girl."
"Oh my god Hunter, stop with your stupid questions. We aren't even romantically involved."
"You will be soon enough. Do you think so too, my boy KayJay?"
"No. We're just friends. I don't even know why I'm answering your stupid questions."
"Emma, you just got friend zoned."
"I'm pretty sure I friend zoned him before he friend zoned me."
"We are done with questions today. We'll call you back tomorrow- OH MY GOD WOMAN, HOW'D YOU GET OUT OF THE CHAIR. I TIED LIKE FIVE KNOTS."
"Where was my chainsaw?"
CALLED ENDED
[author's note]
this chapter was a bit fifty shades of grey.
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Short Story9/8/2020 : i decided to re-publish it all again because why not hehehe ━━━ mind my cringey summary and cringey story that i wrote at 3am under my bed, all lonely and hungry, and afraid of ghosts that comes at 3am because my sister is dumb enough to...
