Joana
Her head hung, her body slumped over. Blood dripped from her busted lip, broken nose, and the cut beneath her eye and landed on her bare legs. Her mouth hung open, unable to breathe through her nose.
When the door opened, her head shot up, eyes wide and crazed. She breathed heavily, adrenaline coursing through her veins. Every part of her screamed to fight, but they were just returning Bucky to his place. Still, her blood rushed, her lungs heaved, her heart pounded in her chest.
And then she saw Bucky and everything stopped. He was covered in blood, mostly his metal hand. He had left, God knows when, and had just returned. She had no idea how long she had been here, but it had been a while. Her hair had grown substantially, as had her fingernails, but someone came to cut them regularly. Her pulse slowed at the sight of him. The two agents guiding him plopped him in the chair and stood on either side of him.
"Bucky?" She called out to him, her voice tight from lack of speaking. "Bucky, it's me. It's Joana."
She said the same thing every time he came back from a mission, every time they wiped him. It never worked.
But this time, this time, almost. He flicked his eyes towards her, as if the name meant something to him. Whatever they had made him do, it related to his past. It wasn't something HYDRA had thought of to erase, it was something they hadn't ever thought would trigger him. For a brief second, Joana almost convinced herself it was Steve, but Steve was dead. But then again, so was Bucky...
Joana shook her mane of tangled hair, trying to shake away the thoughts as well. If there was one thing Joana couldn't do if she wanted to survive was get her hopes up. That was deadly.
She wept silently as they wiped Bucky, his screams ricocheting off the walls and drowning in her ears as they always did.
And then he was gone again.
And then Karpov entered the room.
And then a shadow of malice fell upon them all.
Karpov usually came into the room with a stone face, a stoic posture, dead eyes. Joana was used to that. But what turned her blood to ice and made the hair on her arms stand on end was the cruel grin he wore on his face as he entered. His eyes were alight with wicked excitement. He sauntered in as if everything was his. To be fair, everything was. Well, besides Joana. Karpov made a point to remind her every day that she still belonged to Pierce.
Joana wasn't afraid of Karpov. She wasn't really afraid of anything anymore. Yet, his smile paralyzed her. If a psychopath smiled, it was never a good thing. Joana learned that too.
"Hello, Beautiful Joana," he said to her as he grinned. He looked like a child who had a surprise and couldn't keep it in. She could see the age on his face. It was one of the only ways she could tell that time had passed. Sometimes, she forgot that the sun rose and fell outside of her prison, that there were people out in the world growing old and dying, while she still looked young. She didn't like to dwell on such things.
Joana remained silent. It was best not to talk back to Karpov, even if he addressed you.
"I have a surprise in store for you, Joana." She really didn't like the way he was speaking. "Release her."
Joana's eyes fluttered closed, relishing in the feeling of the agents' fingertips grazing her skin as they removed her bonds. It had been a very long time since human contact wasn't something like a punch or slap. Even once they had removed the chains from her arms and legs, she remained in the exact same place, staring at Karpov with smoldering eyes. Karpov walked over to Bucky and whispered something in his ear. Bucky stood but made no effort to move anymore.
Joana breathed heavily, her pulse rushing again. She tried to keep her breathing steady, but it was incredibly difficult. She itched to leap from her chair and strangle Karpov where he stood and get it all over with, but there was no point. There was no point in fighting back anymore.
"I am amazed at your ability to survive, Joana," Karpov told her, pacing back and forth in front of her. She tilted her head to the side. Really? "Yes, really, Joana. You are a wonder to many of us. What is it keeping you from giving up?"
"'Everyone then who hears these words of mine and does them will be like a wise man who built his house on the rock.'" Karpov glared at her as she spoke. She spoke slowly, emphasizing the words she felt was necessary. She kept eye contact with him, without shaking. "'And the rain fell, and the floods came, and the winds blew and beat on that house, but it did not fall, because it had been founded on the rock. And everyone who hears these words of mine and does not do them will be like a foolish man who built his house on the sand. And the rain fell, and the floods came, and the winds blew and beat against that house, and it fell, and great was the fall of it."
Karpov backhanded her across the face. She yelped, the slap echoing through the room. One agent flinched, turning his head away for a brief second. Joana spat the blood in her mouth on to the floor and looked back at Karpov, who no longer looked giddy or gleeful, but full of hate and rage. He grabbed her cheeks between his fingers, squeezing painfully.
"Your God has no power here," he seethed in her ear. She grinned, showing her blood stained cheeks for all to see.
"You just keep telling yourself that."
He shoved her face to the side and stepped away from her.
"Stand up," he snapped at her. She did so, slowly, her legs and arms shaking. He nodded towards the other agents in the room. They readied their guns.
"Are you going to kill me, Karpov?" She asked, her voice serene, calm, ready. Karpov laughed and shook his head.
"No, no, Joana, I'm not going to kill you." Karpov stepped away from her, the grin returning to his face.
Joana was confused at his intentions until she saw Bucky standing, hands clenched into fists, staring her down. Her heart twisted in a gruesome way and her stomach dropped. Tears formed in her dark eyes and she turned her head away from Karpov as to not show him weakness.
She let a single tear fall from her eye. She would allow herself one tear, one single shred of emotion before allowed what was to come. Summoning whatever strength she had, she turned back towards Karpov, eyes cold, face set like stone.
"I'm ready," she told him. Karpov turned to Bucky.
"Soldat, ubye yeye."
Joana went ridged, but she braced herself. The Winter Soldier went into kill mode and started towards her, his pace fast, and he crossed the room to her in seconds. This was the closest she had been to him in years, and it felt toxic, terrible. Especially when he reached out and grabbed at her throat. When he was centimeters away from her flesh, she dodged out of the way and grabbed his shoulder and elbow.
Karpov looked pleasantly surprised.
Joana loved Bucky with everything she was, but the only way to save him was to survive, which meant she had to beat him in this fight. She had been waiting for Karpov or someone to send Bucky after her in some twist turn of events. It had just been a matter of when and she had prepared. She would not give up so easily.
Bucky didn't seemed shocked that she was fighting back. He was ready to counter her attacks. He was stronger, faster, bigger. She was rusty. She was tired. She knew, from the first time his punch landed on her face, that she was going to lose. She spent too long living in a chair with no training or strength building. There was nothing she could do to win this fight.
When the Soldier pinned her to the ground and started to pound her face in with his metal hand, she knew it was the end. The end of all things. Still, she did whatever she could to survive.
"Buck." He punched her again. "It's me." And again. "It's Joana." Again. "Please."
He was relentless. An agent approached him and gave him a gun. Her heart stopped, maybe for just a second, but it stopped all the same. And for the first time, Joana feared she would actually die, that this was actually the end, that she had survived everything just to die at the hands of the man she intended to save. Tears gathered in her eyes. She found that she was afraid to die, or maybe she was afraid to leave. She didn't want to leave Bucky here alone, alone in this world where nothing was fair and no one was safe. She had no doubt he would make it out of this, that he would escape HYDRA, but the thought of him being alone broke her heart.
Bucky took the gun from the agent and pressed it against her head. He didn't pull the gun right away. He held it against her forehead and stared into her eyes, deep and unfeeling. She closed her eyes, the tears falling, and when she reopened them, his own blue eyes had changed. Hope fluttered up in her heart and for, just a second, believed that she could save him once again.
Even in her last moments she would not give up.
She put her hands over his, pressing the gun against her own head.
"It's okay," she whispered, no louder than a breath. "It's alright."
His eyes seemed confused, unsure, yet his face had not changed. She locked her eyes with his and whispered his name once. She tried to put every ounce of love she had ever felt for James Barnes in that name, that one name.
"James."
In her mind, she pushed every fond memory she had of him into his own thoughts, pleading with him to remember.
The first time they met.
The first time he punched someone in the face for her.
The first time she kicked a girl in the shin for insulting him.
Their first kiss.
Their first dance.
That day in the rain that felt like millions of years ago.
Their dates and the time they spent studying together at the library.
All the upturned lips and boisterous laughs.
All the knowing glances and teary eyes.
All the tear stained letters sent back and forth.
All the day they spent on his roof talking about their future.
She allowed herself to remember all of it, just in hopes that he would to.
And it worked.
He stood up and stumbled backwards, as if someone had hit him in the face with a terrible force.
"Soldier?" Karpov asked, confused. Bucky whirled around towards him and fired the gun. Joana, body still shaking from the adrenaline coursing through her veins, covered her head as the gun fired. Bloody and bruised, her body aching, Joana pushed herself away from the middle of the floor and towards the wall, gasping for breath.
The bullet missed Karpov by a fraction of a hair, and landed in the throat of the agent behind him.
Karpov shouted out orders, telling them to hold Bucky back, to keep him at bay. Joana pressed herself against the wall. The door was unguarded, she was free, she knew the way out. She didn't doubt that she could fly a plane and leave.
But she couldn't leave Bucky.
So she stayed put.
The living agents surrounded Bucky and grabbed him, holding him back, but he was fighting them. He was fighting, screaming, yet he didn't seem to know why. Joana watched, tears still rolling down her face, as they dragged him away. They stopped pulling him to open the door on the other side of the room, but it was just enough for him to break free of their grip. He sprinted across the room with only Karpov in his path. He barreled past Karpov and towards Joana. Joana pushed herself up and off the floor, running to meet him, hoping that he wasn't coming back to finish the job of killing her. Instead, when they met in the middle of the room, he put his arms around her, holding her so close to his body that she almost couldn't breathe.
"Joana," he breathed in her ear. It sent spasms through her heart. She smiled against his chest, tears of joy running from her eyes. He muttered her name again. She could tell that he didn't fully remember her, but he knew her, and he knew her name, and that was enough.
Until they grabbed him by the shoulders and tore her away from him.
Karpov had Joana by the shoulders and pulled at the same time as the agents pulled Bucky. Both Joana and Bucky cried out against their separation.
"Joana!" he reached his hand out, only to have it snatched back by one of the agents.
"Bucky," she sobbed, the tears turning rotten in her eyes, becoming bitter and salty on her lips. The dragged Bucky through the open door and the last thing she heard from him was the sound of him screaming her name. The door slammed shut, her heart tensing against the echo. She could hear him struggle on the other side. He kept screaming, on and on and on until it suddenly fell silent.
Karpov had his arms around Joana, pinning her arms to her sides. She leaned forward, crying silently. When the sound stopped and a few moments had passed, she broke free of his grip and spun around, using her momentum to land a forceful punch to his face. He fell to the ground with a grunt of pain.
"You monster!" She shrieked, punching him again before he could stand. "You vile, loathsome beast!"
Her emotions overcame her and made it difficult to fight, so he easily got her on the ground. Her face was pressed against the cold ground, her tears and snot making the ground around her cheeks slippery. The ground was cold against her bare skin.
"You cannot continue to fight, Joana," he seethed. "If you continue to fight, what will you become?"
She strained her eyes to see him, eyes pinched in a glare.
"I will fight you, Karpov, I will fight HYDRA, until my dying breath."
"Thankfully," he said, pulling on her hair to make her stand. "We won't have to wait that long."
"Show me a hero, and I'll write you a tragedy." - F. Scott Fitzgerald
***
Y'all I'm so happy I finished this chapter *wipes away tear*. It's been so long since I updated and I feel so bad. School is tearing me apart with all this homework and I just started fostering kittens which takes up all the rest of the time I have on my own so I just haven't been able to write as much. Thankfully, I take every ounce of my free time for one of my stories which I guess is a good thing.
I love you all so much and I appreciate your patience with me. I don't know when you should expect another update, but I'm hoping soon.
Many thanks and much love,
authorsbane
YOU ARE READING
Flesh and Bone ◇ Bucky Barnes ◇
FanfictionNot everything Hydra did had a specific purpose. Sometimes they tortured people and ruined lives just because they could. The kidnapping of Joana Kegley served no greater purpose than to help break in their newest experiment. Before her boyfriend w...