Started with a Joke

I need you

*ting*

I lazily grab my phone from my side table. I clicked the notification that I received a few seconds from now.

I found out that it was just a message from our group chat.

Pilipinas 2017 🇵🇭

Tiyang: Celebration at my condo ppl! You better come or else you'll miss the fun 😝

Kumunot agad ang noo ko. Celebration? For what? For winning bronze?

Don't take me wrongly. Hindi ko naman minamaliit ang nakuha ng team namin. I mean, yeah sure, we did our very best to save our country's name, but like as always, it wasn't enough.

Minsan iniisip ko, when will it be enough? Kelan magiging kami naman yung makakakuha ng gold? Bakit hindi nagiging sapat yung best natin?

Then I will realize, oo nga pala. This life is just a game. A typical game that only requires one winner. The game that is fated to have someone losing. The game that cannot be predicted by anyone.

*ting*

I snapped back in reality. I looked at my phone only to find out that I already need to back read.

Tiyang: Capt! You can't miss this. Hindi fair na isiseen mo lang kami!

KKD: No excuses Ate Ye! You, having an LBM is so bulok na kaya.

Ly: Nako, hindi pwede yun. It's either you'll come here peacefully or you'll be forced. And you seriously wouldn't like being forced by us Capt. Haha.

I can't help but to sigh as I read some of their messages. Everyone's calling me Capt, even Alyssa Valdez.

But I can't seem to find the comfort of being called with such name. Well, yes I'm happy that I became the captain of the National Team, but..basta. I can't explain.

I decided to reply, since I don't like being called a snob.

Once I'm done typing, I hit the send button and waited for my message to be seen.

Capt: I wouldn't miss it. Takot ko nalang kay @Alyssa Valdez.

So it's settled. I'll see my national team mates tonight.

I stood in front of Tiyang abby's door. It's already 8:30 and I know most of them are probably dancing their butts while holding a bottle of alcohol. I still have confusion if I should go in or just walk away and tell everyone that I'm not feeling well.

It's not like I don't want to be with them, to have fun with them, to spent some of my time with them. I just have this thing inside my chest that's been bugging me since we've been awarded with bronze. I know we all wanted gold. We all wanted victory, including all the fans of Philippine Volleyball.