The Way Back

Chapter 18

TRIS POV

I wake before dawn, when the sky is a pale blue and the world is quiet.

From what I can tell, I am the first to wake up, most likely because I got a lot of rest yesterday, something I haven't been able to do in a very long time. After lying there and staring up at the trees absentmindedly for a few minutes, I climb out of the hammock, grab my rifle, and walk off deeper into the forest away from the camp. The woods are peaceful and empty, yet full of life and color. After seeing the war torn world, greenery is a rare treat, so I savor the sights around me.

I find the pond exactly where Marcus pointed it out yesterday. It is secluded and not too far away from the camp, but at the same time it is not close either, which is a luxury for what I'm about to do.

The water is clear, and when I bend down to touch it, I find that it is cool. Setting the gun down on the bank, I strip. I take off the dirty, worn clothes that I have not removed for a few weeks and sigh at the freedom. Now I am bare apart from the necklace around my neck holding my ring. Then I step into the pond to clean myself.

It isn't perfect; the water comes up past my waist, and I don't have soap or anything, but this will have to suffice. I take the elastic out of my hair and lean back to wet my head. The water runs through my hair and down my back when I stand up.

Maybe my mind is so relaxed and that is why a memory resurfaces. I don't know why it emerges, but I close my eyes and hold onto it tightly until the whole scene is imprinted in my brain.

As I stare at myself in the bathroom mirror, I don't scrutinize every flaw like I normally do. Instead I see a grown woman. Not plain, not ugly. I am striking, and in a way, beautiful, though I think that has to do with my current situation. If I didn't know I was pregnant, I probably wouldn't see a difference in myself.

Tobias approaches me from behind. A small smile is evident on his lips as he wraps his arms around me, burying his face in the side of my neck. I can tell that it is morning by how quiet he is, how messy his hair is, how his eyes have dark circles underneath them.

"Hey," I whisper.

Pressing a kiss to my shoulder, he murmurs groggily, "Hey."

"Did you sleep okay?"

"Mm-mm," he hums in the negative.

I cover his arms with mine and look at our reflection. When he blows out a heavy breath against my neck, I reach up to cradle the back of his neck with my hand.

"I want to stay home and lie with you all day." His voice is muffled by my shoulder.

"You're a leader," I laugh. "You can't."

He meets my eyes in the mirror and rests his chin on my shoulder. "Shouldn't we be celebrating though?" he asks with a quirk of his eyebrow. "I mean, we did just find out that you're pregnant."

"Maybe."

Tobias places his hand directly over my abdomen, where our baby currently resides. There is already a small, almost nonexistent bump, but I can tell that it is there. I wonder if he can.

"Do you think we should tell anyone?"

His question makes me frown. "Not for a little while," I reply. "I like that we only know about it. Besides, I don't want to tell my family yet. My mother will be happy for us, I'm assuming, but the other two..." I must have a sibling then.