Lost

Chapter 1

Mikey stared around him. It was no use. He couldn't see anything in the pitch black. He sighed softly and curled up into a tighter ball on his floor.

He hadn't meant to run away. It just became too much; all the serious faces, and then the suggestion that his brother... that Gerard was...

Fresh tears stung his eyes and he bit his lip hard. Gerard had been missing for ten days now, and they couldn't find him anywhere. Mikey could still hear some of the cops downstairs, talking to the others in the band. At least they hadn't run away.

You're pathetic, Mikey, he told himself grudgingly. He caught the soft sound of Frank's voice from outside his room and curled up in an even tighter ball. He didn't like it, but he'd been staying away from the younger man more and more to try and stop himself from... everything. He was pretty sure Frank liked Gerard anyway.

Or maybe that was just on stage?

It made Mikey's head spin. He didn't like thinking about Frank, or Gerard, or anything really. He just wanted peace.

"Mikey?" That was Ray. Mikey briefly wondered why he even bothered. Ray knew Mikey wouldn't be opening that door. "Mikey, can we come in?" He didn't wait for an answer as he pushed the door open.

The sudden light infiltrating the darkness hurt Mikey's eyes, and he screwed them shut.

"Mike..." Frank's voice was soft. Mikey could easily see how he appeared to the other two: a pathetic ball on his floor, lying among the broken remains of a desk – he'd tripped over and fallen onto it when he stumbled into his room.

His arm hurt, but he ignored it. He slowly opened his eyes and saw Ray crouched down by him, and Frank standing in the doorway.

"We heard a crash," Ray murmured. "You fell into your desk?"

Mikey nodded miserably. Ray took his shoulders and eased him into a sitting position. He took in the sight of Mikey's left arm, which was the one that had hit the desk, and frowned.

"Frank, can you go get some tweezers and a bunch of plasters? Oh, and some antiseptic wipes."

"Why?" Mikey asked, confused. Ray raised an eyebrow.

"Mikey, look at your arm."

Mikey blinked and looked down at his left arm. There were splinters everywhere, and blood trickling down it. He blinked, unsure of how he hadn't felt much pain.

Frank left and quickly reappeared with his arms full. Ray grabbed the tweezers first and told Mikey to brace himself in case it hurt.

Mikey screwed his eyes shut as Ray began.

*****

Frank watched Ray treating Mikey's arm, slightly numb. He missed Gerard desperately. He just wanted his friend to be safe. He knew Mikey would be stricken as well; after all, they were brothers.

It wasn't long before Mikey started crying, leaning into Ray's chest and sobbing. Frank felt his heart sink a little. He didn't like it when Mikey cried. The lanky male had a massive effect on Frank's own emotions; even now, Frank could feel a lump in his throat.

He sighed and folded his arms, leaning against the wall. He was sure that Mikey was avoiding him, which hurt him even more. He didn't know what he'd done wrong. He watched Mikey sobbing into Ray's shirt, disconcerted. Gerard had better come back soon, and he'd better have a good reason for it.

Truth be told, Frank had a major crush on the lead singer. He couldn't help it. The make out sessions on stage invigorated him, and he always wanted Gerard's attention. Then he just disappeared. Frank was angry.

No, Frank was furious. He couldn't just disappear like that!

He'd found out Gerard was missing when he got a call from a distressed Mikey at five in the morning eight days ago. At first, he'd told Mikey not to worry, and that he was probably just out walking, but then Mikey said that he'd been missing for two days.

Well, then Frank's interest was peaked.

Eight days later, they still hadn't found him, and Mikey was a complete mess. Ray and Frank were only just holding it together for him and themselves. Mikey seemed to think that Gerard went away because of him, which was probably untrue.

Frank wondered if something had been happening with Mikey before Gerard disappeared to make him this distressed. Mikey had been avoiding Frank for a while; even managing it on the tour bus; maybe that had something to do with it?

Heck, maybe this was all Frank's fault and he just didn't know.

Jesus, Frank, he chided himself. That's a little too emo.

He crouched down by Ray and Mikey, worried. Ray put an arm around him and pulled him into a tight hug.

"Group hug?" he asked, but his voice cracked. Frank, sitting half on Mikey and half on Ray, embraced them both.

"Group hug," he confirmed. He looked over at Mikey, whose eyes were closed. There was a small smile on his bloody lip, which he had chewed too much.

"I love you guys," he whispered. Ray stroked his brown hair.

"We know, Mikey." His voice was warm. "And Gerard will be back before you know it. He's too famous to be gone for long. Someone will recognize him."

Frank found himself nodding. "Yeah."

"What if he isn't found?" Mikey fretted.

"Come on, Mikey. That isn't likely, so stop thinking about it."

Mikey seemed to snuggle closer to Ray's chest. Frank frowned. Since when had they been so close?

Ray's gaze was gentle as he watched Mikey falling asleep on him. He then turned to Frank.

"Well, he's finally resting. Is that good?"

"Shut up, you know that's good," Frank smiled. "He hasn't been sleeping."

"I know, I know," Ray chuckled. He shooed Frank away and looked down at the lanky male sleeping on him. Frank took one last look at them before heading out of Mikey's house. He didn't want to leave, but he couldn't bear to stay.

He needed some alone time, to brood.

How emo, he thought with a bitter grin. Gerard would be proud. Then he frowned. Who cared what Gerard would or would not be proud of? The cops had found evidence that he'd left deliberately.

Which meant that all this heartbreak and pain was his fault.