Lost

Chapter 6

Mikey's head pounded as he struggled to open his eyes. He'd been asleep for ages, but he wanted to go back to resting.

He was tired.

More than tired.

Exhausted. Drained. He didn't want to face reality yet.

"Mikey," came Frank's quiet voice. Mikey frowned and tried to ignore him. "Mikey. Come on, I know you're awake."

"No I'm not," Mikey muttered.

"Oh, really?" Frank sighed and Mikey finally opened his eyes. They quickly settled on the shorter male beside him.

"How long have you been there?"

"Long enough." Frank relented. "Two hours."

"You spent two hours watching me sleep?"

"What? No!" He laughed. "I went to the cafeteria to get a snack and talked to your parents a bit. I'm not weird."

"My parents were here?" Mikey groaned and covered his eyes with his hands. Frank was staring at his arms and the lanky male realised they were skinnier than usual. He cleared his throat self-consciously and looked away.

"They were worried," Frank sighed. "I only just managed to persuade them to let you stay with me when you get out. They want to care for you themselves."

"I'm going home with you?" 

"Yeah." Frank smiled. "I hope you don't mind."

"Of course I don't." Mikey yawned and crossed his legs, sitting up. He had a headache still, but it was bearable.

Frank looked as though he hadn't slept at all – his hair was a complete mess, there were dark bags under his eyes, he was a little pale, and his clothes were crumpled.

"Are you okay?" Mikey asked, eyes wide.

Frank frowned. "Yeah. Why?"

"You... you don't look like you've slept."

The shorter man sighed and ran a hand through his hair.

"To be honest, Mikey... I didn't really."

"Why not?"

"Gerard... he came back and we slept together." The words sounded rushed, like he wanted this conversation to be over already. "But I swear we... I wouldn't have if..." Frank sighed. "I was so glad to see him again that I didn't protest to anything..."

Mikey didn't reply. He couldn't breathe. He just stared at his friend with wide, horrified eyes.

"No..." he whispered.

"I would've brought him to see you, but he insisted we go to my place–"

"How could he?"

"–so I just took him there and one thing led to another–"

"I trusted him!"

"–Honestly I thought he'd stay and we'd come see you in the morning but he went like I was just a one night stand..." Frank frowned. "Mikey?"

Mikey was crying. He didn't realise he was until a doctor hurried over and made Frank go away. Then he tentatively raised a hand to his cheek and felt the wet stream down it.

His throat closed up and he slowly lay back down, pulling his blanket over his head.

How could you, Gee? he asked silently, curling into a small ball. He remembered the night when Gerard disappeared clearly, and it made him cry even more. It really was his fault. Gerard did hate him.

Don't remember it, he begged his mind. Don't put me through that again...

Too late. The memory resurfaced.

*****

Gee was sat down in an armchair, a pencil between his teeth and a sketchbook on his lap. Mikey stood in the doorway, a great pressure on his chest.

He had to tell him. Gee was his big brother. He'd understand, right? Mikey sighed and rubbed his tired eyes. He'd probably go to sleep soon. He was tired as.

But he needed to tell someone first, and Gee was right there. He looked up as he finished his sketch, noticing Mikey.

"Hi," he smiled, looking a little confused. "How long have you been there?"

"Just a little while," Mikey replied quietly. "Can we talk?"

Gee shrugged. "Sure. But then you're going to bed. You look tired."

"I am," Mikey agreed, falling down into a chair. Gee shifted around and repositioned himself, putting his pencil and sketchbook down.

"What did you want to talk about?"

"Um..." Mikey started fidgeting. He wasn't sure if there was any subtle way to say this. "I think I'm gay," he blurted. Gee's eyes narrowed.

"What do you mean?"

"I... I think I like boys."

"Are you sure?"

"Y-yeah." Mikey searched his expression, but Gee's face was unreadable.

"What makes you say this?"

"Um... there's a guy... and I think I love him. It's definitely a crush..."

Gee actually cracked a smile. "Who?" he asked.

Mikey closed his eyes. "Please don't tell him," he begged.

"I won't, I won't."

"Frank."

Gerard went silent. Then,

"Frank as in band Frank?"

"Which other Frank is there?" Mikey hissed. But, to his horror, Gerard's smile was gone.

"I think you should go to bed," he said coolly. Mikey blinked, hurt.

"Do you... do you mind?"

"Mind what?" Gerard snapped. Mikey flinched.

"Nevermind," he whispered. He thought he saw guilt flash in his brother's eyes, but he was probably just imagining it. Slowly, the bassist rose from his chair and walked towards his room. When he looked back, Gerard was staring at the ground with an angry expression.

Miky slammed his door, fell onto his bed and cried. He was sure that his brother wasn't accepting him now. Maybe he just hadn't expected it to be Frank? But then why would he act so snappy?

Mikey didn't know, and his unbalanced mind didn't care much. Gerard hates me, he thought wretchedly.

He was upset until he fell asleep, and even then, dreams filled with Frank only worsened his misery.

When he woke up, he spent an hour alone in his bed. He hadn't bothered to take his glasses off last night, so the sides of his nose were red and painful.

Eventually, he got out of bed and walked into the hallway. He guessed Gerard was still in his room when he didn't see him in the rest of the building, but when evening came and there had been no sign of the older Way, he knocked on the door reluctantly.

"Gerard?" he asked. No reply. Frowning, he opened the door and saw an empty bedroom.

So maybe Gerard was out?

That'd be it.

Two days later, there was still no sign of him. That's when Mikey called Frank, panicking.

And then this whole mess started.