❝Hi, welcome to our porn site tech support, how may I help you?❞
In which a crazy girl calls a porn tech support because she was logged out of her account.
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dante | nova | max
[call]
"Entertain me."
"Jesus, Nova. I thought you were my mother."
"Your mother answers the phone with 'entertain me'? Jesus, mine just says 'what do you want?'"
"If you want to talk about how your mother never appreciated you, I really suggest a therapist...or I don't know, alcohol?"
"I'm just bored, Dante. I got sex-iled."
"Sex-iled?"
"It means sex-exiled."
"The fuck is that?"
"It MEANS that I've been exiled of my apartment because my roommate is currently having sex IN it."
"Ooh, jeez. Yikes."
"Yeah, I mean she handed me a twenty and said 'I'm getting busy so go find yourself something to do'. So I'm now in a cafe, strolling through social media, bored out of my mind and eating an acai bowl."
"Acai bowls? Seriously? You basic ass bitch."
"Okay, I'm allowed to be basic. I'm a white girl, duh. And acai bowls are life. They're like a healthy dessert."
"Yo dude, wanna go get boba?"
"Who's that?"
"My friend, Max. Go away, you idiot."
"Oh, so it's another girl? Ooh."
"Wait, what do you mean by another girl?"
"Shut up, Max! It's nobody, Nova-"
"Really? I thought I heard sounds coming from the dorm-"
"Max, shut up!"
"This does not sound compromising at all."
"So who's the girl you're talking to? What's her naaaaameeeee?"
"It's Nova."
"Aww, so what you heteros up to?"
"Having a conversation that nobody invited you to!"
"It's nice how you think I'm somewhat interested in being polite and heterosexual."
"Oh my god. Go away, Max!"
"Okay, I'll leave y'all sexy fuckers to yourself. Have fun. Not too much fun, though. If I see cum stains on that phone, I will disinfect your phone with so much holy water that rice can't save you."
"I'm so sorry, Nova. I had this up on speaker so he heard and-"
