Mahirap maging ina sa batang edad. Masakit ang mga panghuhusga at ang mga pang-iinsulto ng mga taong nakapaligid sakin, lalo na ang marinig 'yon sa mga akala kong nagmamahal at inaasahan kong iintindi sakin. Masakit na parang namatay ang kabataan ko...
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"He don't do love" I cried
Adam rubbed my back. "Why are you crying over that?"
I sniffed. "'Cause he's a pathetic piece of shit" I sobbed.
Why does it has to hurt so much?
"I don't do love" he said in his usual serious tone while looking at the vast body of water, sparkling at the bright moonlight.
Looking at the stars always brought serenity in me, but this time, they can't do their wonders because I can feel a tight clench on my heart.
"You don't believe in love?" I asked in almost a whisper, unable to believe in his ridiculous statement.
I've always seen him as a sensible man. I can't believe that he's sprouting those words. He's Nixon Gareth fucking Vergara, he may be uptight, but not this...
"I feared the emotions" he added. "I saw how it made my Dad's life a misery"
"My Daddy said that his love for Mommy was his salvation" I said in almost a whisper. I was busy contemplating with the foreign feeling I have within me.
He tilted his head smirked at me. "My Dad's love for my Mom became his devastation, Tiana. And I know that I don't want that for myself. I don't want to love somebody more than life. I don't want to feel something that strong and scary. I don't want to revolve my world around a woman, and in the end, I'll find myself alone... drown in the memories and miserable with the love that lingers"
"And you agreed to marry me because you have no plans to fall in love. It's nothing but a business deal" I stated.
He gave me a warm smile. "You can always say no"
I grinned at him. "Nobody deserves my heart, Nixon. I won't love any man more than I love myself"
I was just starting to have feelings for you, but you already declared a game over.
"Then it's a nice deal for the both of us" he smiled.
"You love him?" Adam asked in a gentle tone. But the bitterness won't escape my ears.
I wiped my tears then looked him straight in the eyes.
I took a deep breath. "Adam Cleavan Pichler" I called his name like a prayer. "Marry me"
We stared at me for a while then he pinched my nose. "I love you, Tiana. But I won't marry you for the wrong reasons" he poked my forehead.
I bit my bottom lip. I am Tiana Miracle Amante, but these fuckers rejected me.
"Then let's do the 'love in progress' thingy" I offered
He stared at me like I am the most hilarious phenomenon of the world.
He smirked. "Sure"
"You're now my boyfriend" I declared
"Nah" he said with a naughty smirk. "A goddess deserves nothing but the best" he playfully pinched my nose. "I'll court you. And let yourself fall for an Adam Cleavan Pichler. Truly, madly and deeply"
